Super heroes - ok or bad for kids?

[meandmycuties]

My boys both love super heroes. I think it's fine as long as the wrestling isn't getting out of hand, and like someone mentioned, they know it's pretend, and Jesus is the real super-hero!:D Boy are just soooo different form girls. It's in their nature to be rough & tumble. If it's becoming an obsession, you could tell them to put them up for a while when things get crazy and give them something else to do. I normally would have my boys go run off some energy outside but right now it's just soooo hot!!

[lharris]

I too love super heroes. I work in a library and just yesterday had a very uptight mom censoring every single item the children were checking out. It broke my heart and needless to say this mom has a troubled home, an unwed dau who had a child, rebellious teen etc. Her son, who is a young 12 yr old wasn't allowed to check out spider man because it wasn't of the Lord. Ladies, I say this with all my love and pray that you seek Godly Counsel on your decisions -- but please, try not to censure your children overmuch. The Lord is so amazing, that we often short-change the power of the Holy Spirit. My very godly dau (24yrs) tells other stressed moms that they cannot be their child's Holy Spirit. If all they hear is your voice saying "no no", they cannot even hear the Holy Spirit trying to get a word in edgewise. Personal experience has shown me that when a parent loves rules more than trusting the Holy Spirit, your child will walk away from your faith -- yes I said your faith because an overly censorious home forces the child to accept your God and later reject him, rather than letting the child find God and love Him more and more. Trust the Lord with your child's heart, he will not let you down! Plus when your child can trust that you will engage him in conversations and knows he is safe in your love, he /she will censor himself most of the time. You will not need to do it for him. A christian should never be afraid of literature or art, but discuss it with your child and like the previous posters have said -- use it for a teaching opportunity about good/evil and the power of God. God is not afraid of anything and certainly not your child's imagination, He created the mind and the personality of your child. God himself is the Greatest storyteller and your child's imagination will develop for the Lord, not against him; that is, if you don't restrict your child and give him the impression that a Christian has to be afraid of literature, characters or imagination. All my love,
Laura

PS, I presented a workshop on literature and how you can judge literature for its merit by looking at metaphors and whether the metaphors are flipped upside down using Isaiah's criteria of an evil nation which begins to call good evil and evil good. (Is 5:20) You may evaluate a work of literature for yourself instead of waiting 50 years before pastors decide if something is "Christian" or not. No one read C.S. Lewis during his time because it was fantasy and considered ungodly. I believe the Harry Potter books will be the same, whereas the Golden Compass books will not. The Christian metaphors in the Harry Potter series are very overt and extremely powerful. But I will never press this on a family that is not ready, we are not to create a stumbling block; but like Paul, we have freedom in Christ and have the power of discernment through the Holy Spirit. If you would like more information on literature criteria by examining an author's metaphors, just email me.

[gotpeace91]

Laura,
All this that you say sounds good, but I can't help thinking that the bottom line is; don't censor things from your kids. Let them figure out if it's bad or not for themselves. I don't mean this argumentatively at all, and that may not be what you mean. Just trying to figure it all out for myself. I know that I tend toward being authoritarian, and I'm trying to find a balance. It seems as if you are saying that because this mom is strict, her children are rebellious, pregnant, etc. However, I feel that ,in the overall scheme of things, being more liberal and less careful is what Satan would want us to do...

PS librarians are awesome! I LOVE my library!

Leah

[lharris]

I don't think its argumentative at all and I think you have it right -- balance is what we all are striving for. My point is more for allowing moms to watch and read with their children. But it is very difficult to overhear some of the things some of my moms say to their children. This is not the only reason why I know she has a troubled home, but she definitely has a tendency to overreact and therefore pushes the child right into Satan's hands. I praise God for my own mother who was loving and trusting of me. Again it's the narrow path that Jesus wants us to follow, not leaning towards a legalistic path, nor going the other direction with no boundaries either. Satan plays on our weakness. When your spirit is strong, Satan will flee and your children will feel and see the difference. But never censor something just because someone else told you it was "bad." Always view, read, or listen to the story yourself. I completely understand why it's difficult. Like there are many things especially some of new cartoons or nick shows that I don't care for, and my young son knows that. But I would rather choose my battles very carefully and by using a good curriculum (Heart of Dakota is best) and studying the Bible and when children observe mom, it is much easier for the child to follow than just hearing mom all day, does that make sense. This is a difficult topic and if we do everything in prayer and without fear, God will provide the answer.

[gotpeace91]

I think that you are saying let your children See you being a good example rather than Hear you all the time. That makes sense. I also agree that we should watch or read with our kids. I usually would rather check it out myself first, but sometimes we have impromptu teachable moments when something takes me off guard. My parents were pretty strict, but the only thing I really felt that they overreacted on was Scooby Doo. lol! Now that I'm grown though I think I've survived pretty well without Scooby Doo. It is quite a balancing act. I tend to be the stricter one and I will consult my husband about the rules and he reigns me in a bit. My husband likes to watch spiderman, batman etc. so we don't ban those. But I think my kids are learning much more important things from my husband all the time, like helping others, a strong work ethic, and a good sense of humor. One of my main concerns about books is not only spiritually but intellectually. Is it just junk that does nothing to contribute to their intelligence? Or does it teach them and help them grow intellectually and morally?

[lharris]

I think that you are saying let your children See you being a good example rather than Hear you all the time. That makes sense. I also agree that we should watch or read with our kids. I usually would rather check it out myself first, but sometimes we have impromptu teachable moments when something takes me off guard. My parents were pretty strict, but the only thing I really felt that they overreacted on was Scooby Doo. lol! Now that I'm grown though I think I've survived pretty well without Scooby Doo. It is quite a balancing act. I tend to be the stricter one and I will consult my husband about the rules and he reigns me in a bit. My husband likes to watch spiderman, batman etc. so we don't ban those. But I think my kids are learning much more important things from my husband all the time, like helping others, a strong work ethic, and a good sense of humor. One of my main concerns about books is not only spiritually but intellectually. Is it just junk that does nothing to contribute to their intelligence? Or does it teach them and help them grow intellectually and morally?

First I want to thank all the wonderful ladies who responded to the initial question about super heroes. Wonderful to read!
I loved your previous post and yes that is exactly what I was trying to get at... Sounds like your husband is a very wise man. Don't you love how godly husbands know how to "rein" in their wives. My husband is the same way. I like your reference to Scooby Doo because that is another highly censored cartoon here at public libraries and I have to hear the confused cries and see the fallen countenances. L0L When you use a wonderful program for education, like HOD, then your child is getting exposed to wonderful!! literature, poetry, history etc and they immediately see the difference between quality art and passing fads. I try not to overly stress over fads and light reading for the most part, with the exception of the new attitude fads -- do need to watch that behaviors are not repeated, but I try to discuss the show first. I try to think how I would react if someone was trying to censor me...it usually makes kids view/read in secret -- so I put myself in my children's shoes as much as I can and try to place boundaries in love that we can all live with. For my house, the biggest stopping point -- rule not broken -- is attitude toward God, Mom, Dad older sister/bro etc. My children are not allowed to sound flippant, talk back, attitude (like 'whatever') is an absolute yes- you'll get in trouble from mom Books, stories, movies, music (basically all areas of art) are at least given a first chance at my home. In God's amazing Grace, Laura

[mopdop]

On the super hero issue, we allow our ds to play with them - Batman, Robin, Spiderman etc. He has never been one to play with toys very much, but will play with these figures for hours.

However, anytime he watches one of the cartoons he'll have a nightmare that night. Without fail. We don't have TV at our house - just Netflix through the Wii - and he knows that he's not allowed to watch super hero cartoons, and he understands why. However, we found out he was watching these shows at my parents house, because he would have a nightmare when he came home from spending the day with them!! Turns out he wasn't watching the ones I mentioned above (which he knows not to watch) but Power Rangers (which we'd never discussed), so he now isn't allowed to watch any super hero cartoons. It's the starngest thing, but it honestly happens everytime he watches one. I have actually writted down exactly what channels he is allowed to watch when he is at my parents because, unfortunately, they just don't get it

On the good guy only issue, he spent some time this summer playing a Batman game on the Wii, which we borrowed from a friend. I sat with him most of the time and he liked defeating the bad guys. However, he then worked out that he could become the bad guys - Joker, RIddler etc - and fight the police! The game immediately went back to his friends at that point. There is no way he needs to be acting out the part of the bad guys! Also, my hubby is a Correction's Officer at a state prison, and was horrified with the idea of kids learning to fight law enforcement officials.

So, bottom line for us, ds loves playing with super hero's. As a 3-4 yr old he often wore him Batman or Spiderman costume under his clothes so he would be ready if there was an emergency!! However, as with many of you, he has to be the good guy. Oh, and he isn't allowed to make his little brother the bad guy either!

[gotpeace91]

I think there are a lot of games out there that make it seem more fun to fight policemen! Need for Speed was a game that my oldest son used to play and I remember being appalled that they even allowed that! I think it has the potential to desensitize kids to violence against policemen and make it seem like it's funny.

[Mom of Three]

This is beautiful!

"Since it is so likely that they will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. Otherwise, you are making their destiny not brighter but darker."
C.S. Lewis, Of Other Worlds, "On Three Ways of Writing for Children," found online

[gotpeace91]

This is beautiful!

"Since it is so likely that they will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. Otherwise, you are making their destiny not brighter but darker."
C.S. Lewis, Of Other Worlds, "On Three Ways of Writing for Children," found online

Yes it is! Found myself looking for the "like" button.

[Jessi]

We like superheroes. My son has always had a fascination with roughhousing, fighting, epic battles, and all that. He would turn sticks into guns...even his sister's baton becomes a bazooka. We see nothing wrong with this because he is also my cuddlebug and loves to be affectionate. He knows balance (for the most part...like any kid he can get out of control sometimes)...but I believe that God wired boys to grow up to be MEN. I imagine that David and Samson and Gideon, and so many men of great faith were that way as boys. I believe it is the innate desire to protect and to fight for what's right, to defend the cause of the oppressed, and to put on the armor of God, that the Lord placed within all men. I believe God wants our boys to be men and part of that is being a warrior for Christ. I want my son to grow up to be a warrior for the Lord, to take up His causes, to protect and defend his family, and to defend his faith from the world of pluralism, atheism, and relativism. I guess I see this play fighting as "preparation"...now I just have to train him to harness that fighting instinct in godly ways as he grows.