scared!!! maybe I've made a mistake

[Tree House Academy]

I will just add that I pulled my ds (now 11) out of public school when he was 8 - turning 9 and going into 4th grade. The gaps left by the public school were IMMENSE and it has taken us at least 2 of the 3 years I have homeschooled to catch him up to grade level since bringing him home. And he was not a "slow learner" in ps. No, he made straight A's and was being tested for the gifted program. The ps here is very pathetic - they don't even teach PHONICS and he still has struggles when it comes to sounding out new words in his reading because of this. HIs spelling was horrific and we are just now beginning to make some progress (using dictation from HOD, actually).

One year is not enough time to erase all of the errors taught in Ps. It is also not enough time to correct and fill in the gaps. If God led to you to it (homeschooling), then He will lead you through it. Don't doubt His calling.

[Heidi in AK]

I pulled 4 kids out of ps and what I found is that what had been covered was not actually comprehended and turned into learning. My dd after 3rd grade in ps could not multiply,divide, or regroup subtraction. She is very bright. It had been covered in ps. But she had not learned it. ...So covering things in ps does not always equate to learning material.
...
That may mean that it seems that we are not covering things that ps is and therefore our children are not getting the better education, but in the end the proof is in the pudding. There is a reason top colleges are now preferring hsers. Hsing kids lean how to learn and they have work ethic their ps counters often lack.

Now all that being said there is something much deeper than academics. As hsers we are able to follow God's command to train our children up in the Lord. You can still do that in ps after school. But I have to tell you that I know for sure I could never compensate for the time and the way they are learning in ps away from the teachings of and about God so that they can really know Him and know His voice. And when I had my kids in ps I was diligent about teaching them His ways. But when I pulled them out of ps and taught it to them in everything, that is when I really saw them come to know Him and see Him in everything. It begins to show in how they see the world when they learn about everything through the lens of His word and Who He is. There is no academic test that counts the value of that. I think we can agree that is worth so much more. But we are lucky as hsers we can have both academic excellence and train them up in the Lord. And even more blessed is we get to decide what is academic excellence. We can choose how much of that is standardized test performing and how much of that is being prepared to live life as God is calling them to live. And even better we can ask God for help in that and actually adjust how we teach to what He shows us is His will. And these are the things I think about when I begin to feel the enemy attack me on hsing.

The right answer is what God shows you is right for who He made you and your children to be. Praying He shows you clearly so that you can have peace beyond all understanding. Remember also that those that He calls He is also faithful to equip. I know that for me personally if He calls me to homeschool, He also calls my children to be hsed and He will equip us all for His call in that.

Ditto to this!!! Well said, water2wine!!! TreeHouse makes some good points about gaps. Can't tell you how many times I've seen this, particularly as a math teacher.

[Cherylanne]

Ladies,
Thank you so much for the wonderful godly encouragement you have offered. After reading all the posts you have given me reassurance that we made the right decision. It has also reminded me of the reasons we pulled them out in the first place.
I'm sure these feelings will creep up again at times (especially before testing) but I will pull this thread up and reread all that has been said.

I also can't wait to start using HOD!

[tnahid]

An awesome idea, Cheryl Anne. I am going to do that as well when I feel that fear trying to creep up on me!

[Daph]

I second Andrea's experience...I'm leaving the CS because I feel called to be the one teaching my kids...

Cheryl Anne, I would encourage you to wait for the wise counsel this board offers, especially that of Carrie and Julie, and so many other ladies here.

Why do you not plan to HS in high school?
What does your hubby think?

I believe that you'll find HOD has a flow to it that really meets that desire of yours. I was attracted both by that and the open-and-go characteristic. I bet you will find so much wisdom here that will help you both address your DS's learning opportunities as well as his preparedness.

How old is he? What have you been doing to this point, and what gaps do you already see in his education? Just a few questions to allow us to support you with some thoughts...

I just couldn't do high school. I want them to have some of the opportunities that it has over what hsing would be at that age...sports, clubs, organizations, etc.
Hubby?? well he needs his own thread He was on board for this year...haven't discussed it yet.

He is 9. I have been doing a simple phonics program called Blend Phonics for about a month. It takes 4 months to go through it. I really don't know what gaps there are until they are tested. We are a little behind in math. I printed the state standards for the boys on each grade but it was too hard see exactly what I needed to do.

Let me encourage you in saying that there are lots of those things in HS as well. The group that I'm in has prom and graduation, in addition to organized sports. When I started homeschooling, I wrote a list of pros and cons regarding homeschool and public school, how I knew them. I've learned that some of those cons for homeschool were completely unfounded and untrue. It's why there are so many misconceptions about home school. Studies have shown that HS actually usually score higher than their PS peers, even though HS are not usually taught toward tests as they are in PS. Colleges have special scholarships for HSers. Look into support groups in your area to see what's out there. Ours has co-op classes twice a year, support meetings, get togethers, holiday parties... It's amazing, really, how many HSers there are, and how many opportunities they have available to them.

[Tansy]

Cheryl Anne,
My Dad and I have covered this many times (Dad is a retired superintendent) he would say half the home-schooled kids come back to school behind their peers. He is more open after watching me place my LD DD in PS and then we pulled her back out. He did notice her reading dropped a grade lvl while she was in school and she became even more confused about math. In fact My dd can't do word problems but she scored very strangely in math while in school either she scored kindergarden lvl or she scored a grade above. Just depended on if it was a good day or a bad day.
Yes my dd1 is very far behind She also would be very far behind in her old PS and 30 minutes of a teachers aid 3 days a week plus 2 special Ed classes did not improve her handwriting... the hand therapy at home did.

After much prodding and arguing the first time about Dads statistics. He has opened up to admit that their are 2 types of homeschooling parents. Those who do the work and those who pull their kids for less than stellar reasons, and then don't bother to teach their children. He always took his responsibility as the superintendent over the home-schooled kids seriously. He would visit any kids who's mom didn't' send in timely stuff etc. But he also supported any homeschooler who asked for any help and he'd seen it all.

People pulled kids because they didn't like a teacher or, it was a hassle to get them up at 6 am to get the bus or, because they were drug addicts, free sprits, or actually needed the labor and calling it home school was better than dropping out. Its not only Religious folk who homeschool, nor conscientious parents. So consider who you are being compared to.

[spidermansmum]

I was reading on another board about how lots of homeschoolers are actually behind their pss peers and that many times the pss are doing a really great job educating our kids. It was also mentioned that some homeschool curriculum isn't as advanced as some ps curriculums. The thread has me terrified now that I have not challenged my kids enough and may have lost a year of school for them. On another thread here I stated that we left ps because ds9 couldn't read well at all..(thinking dyslexia) but I thought I would give a year of one on one with him
.....
In all honesty he hasn't made that much progress so far here at home. But at the same time I don't know where he would be if we left him in. We plan to have him tested for LD, but maybe he would have been better off in ps where the expectations would have been higher but he would have had to leave the regular class

Hi there .I have a son who is ASD[autistic spectrum -aspergers] As part of that package he has ADHD,APD[auditory processing disorder].Its not easy to not take their progress or lack of as reflection of your ability to HS .Its hard not to be overwhelmed and wonder if the 'professionals' would do it better.I think you already knew that PS wasnt working for him.
Let us not grow weary in doing good-for in due course we will reap if we do not loose heart.

[Heidi in AK]

Cheryl Anne,
My Dad and I have covered this many times (Dad is a retired superintendent) he would say half the home-schooled kids come back to school behind their peers. He is more open after watching me place my LD DD in PS and then we pulled her back out. He did notice her reading dropped a grade lvl while she was in school and she became even more confused about math. In fact My dd can't do word problems but she scored very strangely in math while in school either she scored kindergarden lvl or she scored a grade above. Just depended on if it was a good day or a bad day.
Yes my dd1 is very far behind She also would be very far behind in her old PS and 30 minutes of a teachers aid 3 days a week plus 2 special Ed classes did not improve her handwriting... the hand therapy at home did.

After much prodding and arguing the first time about Dads statistics. He has opened up to admit that their are 2 types of homeschooling parents. Those who do the work and those who pull their kids for less than stellar reasons, and then don't bother to teach their children. He always took his responsibility as the superintendent over the home-schooled kids seriously. He would visit any kids who's mom didn't' send in timely stuff etc. But he also supported any homeschooler who asked for any help and he'd seen it all.

People pulled kids because they didn't like a teacher or, it was a hassle to get them up at 6 am to get the bus or, because they were drug addicts, free sprits, or actually needed the labor and calling it home school was better than dropping out. Its not only Religious folk who homeschool, nor conscientious parents. So consider who you are being compared to.

Oh goodness, we get so spoiled on this board. I remember being at a party last July when a mom who was homeschooled herself said she would NEVER homeschool. Turns out she had been abused and was one of those turned into cheap labor. I pray for her. There was another woman who was homeschooled who assured her it was probably situational. It was evident by the light shining brightly within her that she was homeschooled the "correct" way.

Anwyay, I'm excited, Cheryl Anne, for your decision, and I'm looking forward to journeying with you!!!

[Cherylanne]

Thanks again for all your comments. I still find myself defending our decision to homeschool to various people if I feel they don't agree. My husband gets upset because I discuss our DS9 trouble with reading. Also, I think people automatically think your child should be ahead of the norm if you do homeschool. I did before I became familiar with the idea. My husband's grandmother (almost 90!), who calls almost everyday and sometimes multiple times a day thinks that because I don't have a teaching degree that I'm not qualified to teach my own kids. She doesn't blatantly say it but it's pretty obvious by her comments. A teacher friend said that kids always come back to ps after parents try to homeschool. She lives in a very small rural area.

On a side note I was thinking about how DS9 loves history. He said the other day that when we learn about a particular subject or time period he wishes he'd live back. He will try to dress up in clothes from the era. I do love his imagination. They watched a video on indians and he begged me to let him go outside in the woods to work on his fort! :0) He couldn't do that in ps!

[lharris]

Hi Cheryl Anne,
I hope that you are feeling much more encouraged by now. I only wanted to add about your son's potential learning disabilities?? Just be aware that many ld are really training disabilities. In other words poor training generally related to phonics instruction. When students are taught to read by rhyming patterns (as in ps), their eyes can take on a involuntary movement to look at the end of the word before looking at the beginning of the word. This flick of the eye pattern is what starts many and I'm going to be so bold as to say most learning disabilities. I don't remember how old you said your son was, but please consider working 10 minutes on phonics instruction to possibly correct poor eye techniques, training the eye to look at the left/beginning of the word and moving to the right. Many children who are already reading will look at the whole word and you may not notice that eye/brain patterns working incorrectly. The phonics books that Carrie suggest in the younger guides will help, or you might look at Spell to Write & Read or Ordinary Parents Guide to Teaching Reading (older students)for additional 10 minutes a day. The other component of most learning disabilities is the lack of short amounts of disciplined focus. HOD is wonderful because it trains the child in the Charlotte Mason approach of short, in depth lessons. During boxes of Math, Reading, and copywork ask the child for good posture, complete focus with eyes,ears, mouth etc. for the 10 or 15 minute session. These short spurts of focused discipline will help eliminate other types of attention disabilities. Then during storytime boxes such as history, storytime, Bible or even poetry, the child may relax the posture, hold something in his hands, gets some wiggles out while he's still listening and thinking. This pattern will diminish as the child grows, but an older child may need to go through these expectations of short strict focus and relaxation phases until the self control comes up. Much blessings on your journey
Laura

[Cherylanne]

Laura, Thanks so much for your insight. This is exactly why I haven't pushed for a definite "diagnosis" to his struggle. I believe all that you said. His lack of abiltiy to focus is so frustrating for me. This combined with my inexperience in hsing makes for some long/hard days. Another reason why I'm so attracted to this curriculum. I am just choppin at the bit to get it!

[my3sons]

...I still find myself defending our decision to homeschool to various people if I feel they don't agree. My husband gets upset because I discuss our DS9 trouble with reading...

This part of your post made me think of a few previous threads that were such good discussions about some highs and lows of choosing to homeschool that I thought you might enjoy reading:
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=370&p=2607
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=5830
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4929&p=36328

In Christ,
Julie

[Daph]

Ladies,
Thank you so much for the wonderful godly encouragement you have offered. After reading all the posts you have given me reassurance that we made the right decision. It has also reminded me of the reasons we pulled them out in the first place.
I'm sure these feelings will creep up again at times (especially before testing) but I will pull this thread up and reread all that has been said.

I also can't wait to start using HOD!

They do creep up, especially around family and friends who don't agree. Doing what you know that God has called you to do overrides all of those doubts and negativity. I'm excited to use HOD this year, too! I hope you have a great school year!

[Tree House Academy]

Ha. No. Maybe if you are in an area where the ps is just top knotch, but where I am...NO. Ps is a horrible failure and my ds, who was considered "gifted" in the ps he went to for 4 years, came home after 3rd grade and couldn't write a proper sentence, couldn't spell, and read by sight only. It takes quite a long time to start seeing results from home teaching. What you are likely doing right now is going back and filling in all of the "gaps" left by his time in public school...especialy as a child with a LD. We went backwards for a long time before we ever went forward with my older son...and some things we will struggle with for a long time to come, no doubt. For instance, my ds was taught to read by sight in ps Kindergarten and First grade and to this day, he has a hard time phonetically pronouncing words. My younger ds has been taught from home from day one and he reads as well as I do at only 7 years old. Phonics makes a BIG difference. He also still struggles a lot with spelling, but I have found that the dication used in HOD has really done a lot to help that. I expect that time will also help, as will continuation in the dictation.

Take heart that God will equip you in something He has called you to do. If you are here, then it very well may be His calling for you to use HOD. I was once a curriculum junkie too...but never again. HOD has changed our lives and our homeschool path.

My sons also tested beautifully (well above grade level in most areas) last year on the Stanford achievement test for their grade levels.