boys dont LOVE it-but are tolerating-disappointing?

[twyla]

We are into our 3rd week of Bigger with 9 year old boys. I have seen alot of areas of progress already-the dictation is great, the art projects are good-we are using everything as scheduled but taking three weeks to cover 2 weeks-kinda spreading it out so they will be in 5th grade for CTC. However, they are not LOVING it-is it their age? Is it because they are boys? Am i expecting too much from them. I do having the do the independent history but really scale back on the copy work as they are just learning the cursive. I know it is more that i use to expect of them-and they don't have as much "free" time and they keep asking "how much do i have left" I have tried a schedule but i seem to feel so pressured to "keep up" with the schedule-and it's hard to determine who will do teacher work first and who will work independenly first. Of course we do some together but language, math, dictation, and sometimes Bible we do separetly. I have older children that also need some of my time as well so i am a very busy mom. Any thoughts or suggestions? Should i slow up even more? We usually start at 9:00 and stop at 11:45 (they have a few mini breaks while i work with the other during that time) Then we usually spend another 45 after lunch. We are done by 2:00.
thanks for any thoughts
twyla

[skaylie693]

I have just discovered HOD and am planning to use it for next year so I may or may not be able to answer your question as it's related specifically to HOD but I wanted to chime in. I have a boy who will be turning 8 soon. I pulled him out of public school last year and we have spent much of the year dealing with him pouting about having to do school at all. I struggled and fought with him a lot at first and then I decided to slow things way down. I found, with him, that his reluctance over school had nothing to do with not wanting to do it but instead his confidence was low. For whatever reason, he could do fine with his dad teaching him on the days dad had to fill in but when it came to me, we struggled. One thing is he wanted to work more independently where I had a tendency to sort of hover over him. It made him nervous! Now I go over something with him, show him what work needs to be done, and then walk away.

Also, at first I picked out all of his reading books and we fought over reading. I thought he didn't like to read. I started letting him pick out the things he wanted to read, and now we're back to me assigning different things and he reads without a problem. (I even hand him the Sunday comics on Sunday's and say "I want you to take some time to read this today." It just gets him into doing it more without realizing he's practicing something he never wants to do during school time.) It wasn't that he couldn't read (in Kindergarten (public school) his teacher told me he was at a 3rd grade reading level so I knew he could read well) but he needed something he enjoyed in order to boost his self confidence.

We spent the first half of this year going at a snail's pace and with no schedule at all. We might do one subject this morning when we got up, then have a free day and then fit another subject in after dinner. Or someday's we would take the day off and go burn off some steam at the playground but then do a little bit of school on Saturday.

With my son, I had to slow things way down and build him up. We also use other things to learn. He helps me with dinner sometimes and I show him how to measure ingredients. Or we watch an educational video on something he wants to know more about. (He likes animals and "how'd they build that" type of shows. I use anything he asks about as an opportunity to say "let's look it up" so we can learn more about it. I've even asked him.

I don't know how long you've been homeschooling so none of this may help you at all. I know boys tend to be more reluctant than girls and I think it maybe a case of building them up to your expectations. 3 weeks is not nearly long enough to do that. I'd say slow it down even more...break up the day even more if possible, and let them work up to the expected level. For example, my son just does not have the capacity to concentrate on school for long periods of time. His attention span is short but he is so smart that it blows me away. I want his attention span to be longer so I push him a little more and a little more along the way. It may take a while but we will build it up until he's where he needs to be. In fact, I think some boys tend to struggle in public school because it's in their nature not to have the attention span that girls have. God designed girls and boys different.

Oh, and one other thing...perhaps the most important, pray. Pray a lot and let God guide you with your boys. Perhaps their purpose in life is different and they need something more or something less. God can guide you in that.

Hope some of this helps!

[Tracee]

I'm not an expert in this in anyway. My children are still pretty young, but I wanted to give you some encouragement. My ds is only 6, so we are doing LHFHG, which couldn't be more fun, but he still complains. He loves the left side of the program now, which he only tolerated before, but he still tries to moan and complain about the right side. I can't imagine what our school day would be like without at least the left side of LHFHG.

Recently, I made a calendar so he would know what is expected of him each day. I told him that there will be no more complaining. I empathize with him and I already know that he doesn't like doing the right side, so he doesn't need to keep complaining. If he does, he won't get to do the fun things he likes to do when his schoolwork is finished. Right now, we are really stressing how important attitude is. I try to give him lots of praise while we are doing the work he doesn't like. It's so weird, because most of the time when we are doing the right side, I can see him enjoying it. I t hink it is just the initial thought of, "now I have to sit down and do this" . My son who is only 4 doesn't want anything to do with school, but his twin sister loves to sit down like a big girl and do her school work.

Also, we were at a park playdate yesterday, and one of the mom's said come on it's time to go, we have some schoolwork to do, both of her boys hung their heads down, made a face and moaned. I think it's pretty normal and has nothing to do with HOD. Don't get discouraged. Keep praying, pray before aloud before you actually do any schoolwork, and maybe just let them know that it's not acceptable.

Tracy

[psreit]

I have an almost 8 yo girl. She has some attention and processing difficulties, so I know basically why she has the same attitude toward her work. We are doing LHFHG and it is just the right amount of work for her. Sometimes I try to get her to do more reading or writing than she can tolerate. Those are her biggest areas of struggle. Just this morning it happened. She did wonderful through all of her work until we got to phonics/reading. Then the attitude went downhill. I did have a talk with her about her attitude and disrespectful tone of voice. I told her that would not be tolerated and we would have consequences for it. I also told her that I understand reading is hard for her, but that she needs to try so that she can learn to be a good reader. It's hard for me to know when dd is just becoming frustrated or if she just doesn't want to do it. If you have a struggling learner, I would suggest slowing down. But, if it is just that they would rather be doing something else, you need to make sure that you do not let them dictate what they should be completing each day. My dd does great with the left side and storytime. Although I definitely want to do history/Bible first, I'm thinking that maybe I should scatter Math, Reading, and Writing among the other things rather than trying to do them all at once. That may be something to try. When the attitude gets bad, a reminder that we are not pleasing Jesus is necessary. That's the great thing about HOD. It is based on the Bible to teach our dc character and how God wants us to live. HTH

[Tree House Academy]

This is a tough question to answer. The first thing I would encourage you to do is to give it time. Remember that while HOD is fun and exciting in a lot of ways, there is also WORK involved. It is probably work they are not yet used to doing and some of it, they may find challenging. My older son is working through CTC and overall, he adores it. He loves it when compared to things we have done in the past. He loves parts of it at all times - like art/poetry, Science, Read Alouds, Bible Study, Math, Dictation, Genesis/Geography study, DITHR, History projects, and History readings. Things he doesn't LOVE but does "tolerate" are things like the History summary (it takes time), English on days when he has to write a paper, Write with the best when it is challenging for him. See a pattern here? Writing is tough for him, BUT over the course of this year, he has learned to do it so well! He may not ever "love" it, but as long as he puts his best effort into doing it well and correctly, then I think HOD is still doing what it is meant to do. Not every child is going to love every little thing...but compare it to learning with a textbook..."read story, answer questions...wash...rinse...repeat." With HOD, you are switching books (things never get boring), doing hands on projects in Science and History, etc.

The subject matter may also be the culprit. My son likes some subjects in History more than others...same with Science...and even Poetry.

I think that, as you continue with Bigger Hearts, you will start to see the "big picture" and so will your kids. As time goes on, it won't be so much an "am I thrilled with every little thing" as much as you will be able to look at the whole thing and say, "WOW! My kids are learning so much...this curriculum is so God honoring...and this beats the tarnation out of a textbook curriculum!!"

Hope this helps! Stay encouraged!