Do you think HOD could work for this child? Or PS is better?

[exodus007]

My almost 6 year old son (in Oct) has a mild language &speech delay . He puts sentences together , communicates his wants, needs although not clear and not always in a proper grammar .
Not so much feelings though.

He often has difficulty answering SIMPLE questions, at times from books. For ex. today we read the story of Cain&Abel and when I asked what did Cain do , he couldn't tell even if I read it about 5 times ! The more I ask , the more he gets nervous and can't tell anything. If he is more relaxed, he can concentrate and usually he gives me the right answer but not always. But he is not able to retell ANYTHING yet !


Recently he started to makes faces when anxious ( sticks his tongue out, grimaces , blinks ) or when I ask questions about what we read .
Also recently he started to stutter too . Some days worse than others .In the beginning it was VERY bad , now it's bad only when he is anxious or--I noticed when he has something with soy ( though he tested negative to soy , his allergy was only milk&eggs).


He will answer questions inappropriately at time i.e. "When do you go to bed? answer: "because I'm tired". His ability to answer question is inconsistent.

He does NOT tell stories the way most kids his age do i.e. "At church, we went outside and play then the teacher read a book about Jesus. Mike didn't come because he was sick ". He will answer specific questions, in brief terms but never tells stories. He has problems with directions, again at times, other times he can follow a 3 step direction. At church/playgroups /Awana he never self-initiates, he needs cueing and reassurance to act. He is very quiet and reserved , morein public than home. He only speaks when spoken to. He is cooperative and is described as very"eager to please". He seems somewhat more immature than most kids his age, overall.

He does not play creatively at home . He cannot even draw properly , only scribbles ... yet his handwriting turns out nice ( he does a beautiful job in copywork) . He loves amusement parks maps ( Disney , Universal) and stares at them for days/months . He even sleeps with them. He is obsessed with rollercoasters and all day he simulates that he is one . He runs around the houses , at the dentist office, etc pretending he is in the rollercoaster or maybe that he is the rollercoaster (not sure). The previous years it used to be the snow, although we live in FL and he has never seen the snow , other than books !


He seems to be bright. He has started reading easy readers books (Amelia Bedelia) , my guess is that he is reading at middle to end 1st grade level. He understands what he is reading too if it's a simple story only but NOT Amelia Bedelia,although he can decode the words . He can spell short vowel words and one syllable long vowel words (steps , rest , bike shot , sheep , etc) . He counts&recognize numerals to 100 , does simple addition w/abacus or fingers only . He rec. a penny,nickel, dime but cannot count them yet. He does not understand the place value yet .

Two doctors did not dg him with anything else than speech delay. I feel there is more but I cannot put a name on it! Maybe some of you have a similar child ...please share your experience.

I though that maybe he needs to be in a school setting so he would get used to be around kids. MAybe that will make him more "social" and also thay would work on his comprehension issues . I don't know what else to do other than asking questions from what we read. How will he do with complicated books as in Little Hearts ( I own a few) ?

I am ready to give up homeschooling him because I feel inadequate in helping him with his needs (speech, comprehension , learning style) but I am very nervous as to how he will do in school.

Any insight or comments into this situation would be very much appreciated!! Thanks!!

P.S. Also , which level is most appropiate for him? It was suggested to me Little hearts but in reading and math he doesn't seem to fit so do I do these separate ?

[John'smom]

First of all I'm praying you will receive clear direction from the Lord. I don't know how to answer most of your post as I don't have any experience with what you are talking about.

I will say though that it does sound like your ds plays creatively with pretending he is a roller coaster. My own ds (turned 8 in June) right now eats, sleeps, and drinks rollercoasters. He may not pretend he's on one like your own ds, but after school is over he's drawing coasters, rides, and whole amusement parks. His most recent is entitled "God's Domain" and all the rides relate to Biblical stories. My ds also loves maps. He has maps from amusement parks, zoos, aquariums, museums, etc... He doesn't necessarily sleep with them, but keeps them in a folder, pulls them out and pours over them. He then draws his own maps. Since he was small, he could draw intricate maps of our neighborhood and they would be correct.

I guess I say all this to say that this sounds very "normal" to me.

Also about the Amelia Bedelia, both of my dc don't always "get" exactly what the humor is suppose to be and they are 6 & 8 yrs. old. I don't think that means he's behind at all. I just looked up in my Beyond Manual and Amelia Bedelia is on a 3.1 grade reading level. That means 3 grade first month. He's doing really well reading Amelia. To me it sounds like his spelling is where a 6 yr. old should be as well. Also first grade is when they start learning their addition facts. I don't think my 6 year old could count money either unless it was all pennies. Again doesn't seem behind to me.

I hope something I've written helps ease some of your concerns.

[exodus007]

Well, I am not too concerned academically ,I know he is doing pretty good except maybe the place value , I keep showing him with the abacus and base ten blocks and he doesn't get it. Mostly I am concerned that he does not comprehend books andI don't mean Amelia Bedelia only which I know it's tricky. For ex. I read today Cain&Abel and among other questions I asked what did Cain do to Abel and he said he threw him into the pit ( a few weeks ago we read about Joseph) . Also , after reading I asked who was the father of Cain he said Abraham ... So if he cannot get simple things like that , will he understand harder books like those in L Hearts package ? Or maybe I should start him in Little hands and wait one more year for the next package?

[momofabcd]

My dd 5.5 will sometimes have a hard time answering simple questions such as What did Cain do to Abel? When she can't answer, I simply re-read the portion of the passage that has the answer, then she usually gets it . Listening attentively and being able to articulate an answer are learned skills, IMO. Right now, we are reading The Adventures of Reddy Fox in LHFHG. I will honestly say that it is difficult for her to answer the questions. But this kind of questioning is also new to her, so I really have to guide her in answering them. I imagine by the end of the year she will have improved tremendously just from the repetition of learning this new skill. At least that's what I'm hoping. So, be encouraged that it's okay to guide him to the correct answer at this age. As for his ability to tell stories, could that just be related to his speech delay? If you are still concerned, could you see an occupational therapist? They may be able to see something a normal doctor may not.

[krismoose]

Hi and welcome!
I am a speech-language pathologist now homeschooling my dc, and I used to work in a variety of PS settings. Your description of your son is very clear - you are very observant! The examples you gave of what your son can do and what he has trouble with sound like what I'd expect him to have trouble with if he has a delay in his understanding of language as well as his expression. It's why he answers the wrong questions, such as those having when/why or more abstract concepts such as time and location. I want to encourage you that this is an excellent curriculum for working on language skills. There are hands-on activities every day that will help teach him the concepts he lacks, and the short lessons will be great for learning bite-size amounts of info. I think if you did Little Hearts for his Glory slowly, such as taking 2 days to cover the Learning Through History page and Storytime, while doing math, reading and writing/fine motor at his level daily, he would be able to enjoy learning the concepts. You could just continue on at that pace as long as needed, even taking 1.5-2 years to complete it, just keep progressing in reading, math and writing at his level. The first half of Little Heart's history is mainly from the Family Time Bible which has great pictures. You could even read the story a second time or from a different picture Bible on the second day to help him learn it. A slower pace wpuld allow him to grow and mature into the second half, which would be less familiar than the Bible. It may take a bit to get into the Burgess books, but there's nothing wrong with explaining the chapters over to him for the first while, months even if needed. I found a $3 coloring book on Amazon that had all the main characters so my ds had an image to attach the story to. I've read of others printing out pictures of the characters from the internet and making little stick puppets to help their dc retell the stories. You could certainly go with Little Hands to Heaven, but I think a 6 year old would enjoy the science and other activities in Little Hearts much more.

I will pray that you and your dh hear clearly from God how he wants you to educate your dc. While the social aspect of language delay can be significant and I understand why you want him to have more practice, I would caution you that a child with delayed language is in a more vulnerable position socially, and that if it was my dc, I would be very careful what situations he is in where he'll have to figure out how to "get along" on his own, possibly with incomplete or wrong perceptions of what's going on socially. Has he been receiving speech/language therapy?

Anyhow, I just want to encourage you that this could be a great fit for your son, as the program is very flexible. HTH

[countrymom]

I think the HOD curriculum is perfect for a child struggling in some way. Here are a couple of my thoughts, just my opinion, for what it is worth. I would not worry about socializing and would not expect formal school to "help." There is plenty of research that shows the opposite. Up to the ages of 8-10, preferably 11-13 according to some professionals, children thrive best in their own home. Also, children are ready for formal schooling at different ages. You son is doing a lot for age 6. Although he may have some processing issues, he is learning. There is something called the "integrated maturity level" that has to do with a child's maturity according to brain development. Many children are not ready for formal education in the way we present it by age 6. When pushed, especially in a formal setting, they can become poor performers throughout their school years and some diagnoses of dyslexia, etc. are actually simply lack of integrated maturity. HOD uses a format that is recommended for the younger years - short amount of time per subject, lots of activities using multiple skills, introducing the child to his or her world through nature, and so on. I think you are in the right spot and taking Little Hearts slowly is probably the correct level. You could use whatever reading and math level you think he is at. I'll be praying for you.

[Tree House Academy]

Hi and welcome!
I am a speech-language pathologist now homeschooling my dc, and I used to work in a variety of PS settings. Your description of your son is very clear - you are very observant! The examples you gave of what your son can do and what he has trouble with sound like what I'd expect him to have trouble with if he has a delay in his understanding of language as well as his expression. It's why he answers the wrong questions, such as those having when/why or more abstract concepts such as time and location. I want to encourage you that this is an excellent curriculum for working on language skills. There are hands-on activities every day that will help teach him the concepts he lacks, and the short lessons will be great for learning bite-size amounts of info. I think if you did Little Hearts for his Glory slowly, such as taking 2 days to cover the Learning Through History page and Storytime, while doing math, reading and writing/fine motor at his level daily, he would be able to enjoy learning the concepts. You could just continue on at that pace as long as needed, even taking 1.5-2 years to complete it, just keep progressing in reading, math and writing at his level. The first half of Little Heart's history is mainly from the Family Time Bible which has great pictures. You could even read the story a second time or from a different picture Bible on the second day to help him learn it. A slower pace wpuld allow him to grow and mature into the second half, which would be less familiar than the Bible. It may take a bit to get into the Burgess books, but there's nothing wrong with explaining the chapters over to him for the first while, months even if needed. I found a $3 coloring book on Amazon that had all the main characters so my ds had an image to attach the story to. I've read of others printing out pictures of the characters from the internet and making little stick puppets to help their dc retell the stories. You could certainly go with Little Hands to Heaven, but I think a 6 year old would enjoy the science and other activities in Little Hearts much more.

I will pray that you and your dh hear clearly from God how he wants you to educate your dc. While the social aspect of language delay can be significant and I understand why you want him to have more practice, I would caution you that a child with delayed language is in a more vulnerable position socially, and that if it was my dc, I would be very careful what situations he is in where he'll have to figure out how to "get along" on his own, possibly with incomplete or wrong perceptions of what's going on socially. Has he been receiving speech/language therapy?

Anyhow, I just want to encourage you that this could be a great fit for your son, as the program is very flexible. HTH

What a wonderful post and such great information. I just wanted to add that keeping your ds who struggles so much at home will be the absolute best thing for him. Often those kiddoes are overlooked in ps. They will be ridiculed, judged, and sometimes even treated harshly by peers. Kids don't understand the why's of a child being different. My older son has ADHD and anxiety issues (though he is not delayed in any way and oddly enough, does excellent academically), he is still very inmature for his age. Ps with him was a nightmare and it really shaped him from a young age. We pulled him out in 3rd grade and we have struggled with his self esteem and behavior issues ever since. If you feel the Lord is leading you to keep your son at home, please do so. I know it will be hard, but the one on one attention he will get from you (someone who loves him dearly and unconditionally) will reap more rewards than you could imagine throughout his early years.

I am praying for you as you make your decisions. Welcome to the board!

[Kristin]

One of our daughters was 5 when she came to us and was very behind in every area. She had to attend PS for K, since she was still a foster child at that point. The situation was extremely stressful for her. She came home in tears every day. She has a fairly severe speech delay and because of that she had a big problems making friends. So don't think that PS will help your son be more social. She also had a very hard time narrating anything back to me or even answering questions about what I read. We did Little Hearts and Beyond and are almost ready to move into Bigger. She finally is usually able to tell me what I have just read to her. She still doesn't get it 100% of the time but the progress over the last 2 years has been amazing. Even if it doesn't seem like your son is ever going to get it just keep trucking along and you will see his progress, even if it seems slow.

[Tmisek]

Your son sounds quite a bit like mine in many respects! He also has speech issues, though never "officially" diagnosed. He is very reserved and a bit uncomfortable in a group setting, but not at home. Is enamored with maps, fireworks, Webkinz, and how fast things can go...sometimes you have to tell him to stop talking about those things! He doesn't really like to color or draw. Doesn't tell stories in detail. Is still working on comprehension in books with few pictures (and I am seeing progress). Etc.

But, I am so glad that he is home with me! In public school, if a child is at all "different" from the other kids (even in a GOOD way), they are often shunned or made fun of or labeled or picked on, and that can be quite stressful/damaging and hurts them socially. My son (and yours ) are precious gifts from God and they all have their "quirks" which make them different and special.

I think you are the best teacher for your son! You know him best and love him the most. You can go at the pace he needs. For my son, we are using LHFHG at half-speed with the first grade options. (Last year we used K math, handwriting, etc.) He is a "natural" at math, so we use Singapore Primary 1A and the Beyond Manual for the hands-on activities. This pace seems to be good for him right now. I pray you find God's wisdom!

[Tansy]

To answer your question Yes.. Since HOD is so flexible you can take it slow and no pressure approach.

Now about your fears I know how you feel, My dd was obsessed with mirrors, couldn't tell a story (still needs help), in a social situation she would hang back never initiate, or run away. I struggled and struggled, knowing some thing was wrong. They labeled her developmentally delayed, told me to do sensory things with her and gave her speech therapy. but still the problems persist. I was even approached by camp counselor who ask me if my child was autistic!! eeep they should not let sophomores off campus!

My daughter has a problem with milk if she drinks it, her speech becomes slurred and things get more and more difficult for her. Yet she did not test positive for a milk allergy. But that doesn't mean she not reacting to it. Cause something is going on! and milk triggers it!

I did not receive adequate assistance from the Public school ( she is in PS due to other reasons), In fact the Special Ed teacher has taken to picking my brain since she has seen such improvement in my child in one year.
What made the difference was Little Giant Steps (LGS), they use a nuro developmental approach. Just a few of the things they found were: My dd's short term memory was way below norm, and she had audio processing issues (think dyslexia of the ears), they made me get a tampanagram of her ears, which led to tubes in her ears, because her inner ears were so clogged and full of infections that the ENT never found by looking! No wonder she never could re-tell anything but the last sentence. She also had not out grown her fear paralysis reaction (some baby thing you supposed to out grow at 6 months), 3 months of physical exercises actually has dramatically reduced the Deer in the Head Lights fear response. She now gets 4-5 days of 2 -2.5 hours of therapy a week to address all the multiple issues she has.

I can't tell you how much this stuff has helped allay my fears for her future, as well as her here and now. She actually has 4 friends in school this year and is coping, the therapy is also helping her with the other stuff relating to her adoption. I'm actully thinking I could HS her next year again. (*Hopes * Prays*)

Some things you can look for is a lack of cross body movement can your ds cross his right hand at the same time as his left knee is coming up, and then left hand at the same time as his right knee when marching. If he gets mixed up easily I would find a therapist! I love LGS they do not label they help, and they train YOU. I could wax eloquent, but then I'd write a book. One thing I noticed is the PS system compartmentalized my child giving therapies via a specialized therapist where the nurodevelopmental approach saw her as a whole person and the treatment is all inclusive and interconnected.

Try this with your son. if he is getting more info visually than auditory this will help with narration. Draw pictures while you tell the story, either in cartoon story line or one big scene with all the parts drawn out. Then you start tell 2 sentences he does one, and he can use the picture you drew to help him. You take off all the pressure. Eventually as he gains confidence you do 1 he does 1, till you ease your self down to the "I need a little help" card. Eventually you have him drawing his own picture while you read (slowly or 2x) then he tells you the story.

Huggles,
Tansy

[exodus007]

Thank you very much for your encouraging posts ! I feel so much peace now knowing I am in the right direction and I strongly feel the right thing for him is to homeschool . I am still pondering whether to buy Little hearts or hands since I feel he is not ready for any narration work yet even though academically he seems at or above his age .

Yes, he is going to speech at PS only and I don't see any improvement for the last two years other than normal developmental growth ...I am not sure it's even worth the drive and my waiting time which is one hour/week on the go with a baby and a preschooler who have to wait for him.

This is such a great board and I've learned a lot just reading through posts . I love the pictures posted in The week section !

[exodus007]

krismoos,
could you give me a link for that coloring book you mentioned on your post?
thanks!

[Matt'sMom]

exodus007,

Just wanted to say that I will keep you in my prayers. It is so hard to watch our children struggle and not know how to help them. I know you are trying so hard to understand what he needs and how you can best provide it. I wanted to suggest something for you to look into. My 10 yr. old ds struggles with a lot of the things you described. My son has been in treatment the last 2 years for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and although we have seen a world of improvement in this area we had other concerns and therefore his Dr. suggested other kinds of testing. We have recenlty recieved a diagnoses of Expressive Languge Disorder. Part of what we see with ds is a lot like what you described. He has a very high vocabulary but struggles with finding the right words. Therefore he may have the vocabulary to answer a question but not the ability to retrive the correct words and the ability to put those words into the correct order to retell or narrate. Because the answer is in there and he can't figure out how to get it out he becomes very frustrated. If pushed to answer he gets angry. Another part of the big picture is he is a very slow processor. ( I understand this is part of the ELD). If he is asked to retell he usually tells only the first thing or the last thing that was read. He can not keep much information and give it back that quickly. Something different with him than how you described your child is that he can answer specific questions. He just can't retell from a prompt. ex: if you say something like tell me anything you can remember about what we just read he will say nothing or the very last thing. On the other hand if you ask specific questions like "What happened after the boys got home? " he can tell you almost every time. Since we have recieved this information it has made it much easier for me to understand what is happening. I know that we have to go slow. I know it takes him along time to answer. I am learning not to be afraid of the silence. Before I knew about his processing issues I would ask a question and if he did not respond quickly I would try to"help" him by giving him hints or promts. This only made the situation worse because it gave him something else to try to process and interrupted what ever thoughts he already had about how to answer. Now I try to just sit quietly so he can think it through. We are in the very early stages of being aware of how to help him. In fact we have not even been able to get him in speech yet because our insurance does not pay for speech unless it is needed as the result of an injury or an illness. I know you said that your child has already been seen by 2 Drs. My son had several batteries of test including a full pschoylogical evaluation. I think this may be something that is not easy to diagnose but that will make a huge differance in how he can develop because you will understand better how to help him. I am sorry to write such a long post and please do not think I am suggesting I know what the answer is and you don't. I just wanted to share the idea. If your read about ELD and the shoe fits I think it would be worth pursuing because just the little we have learned so far has made our school day easier. I pray the the Lord will led you to the answers you seek and that he will give you peace and assure you of the path you need to take to help your child become all he can be. God bless you.

Durea

[water2wine]

Welcome to HOD! I am going to second Rebecca's post. I have a child with special needs. Hers is cerebral palsy. With that she is speech and language delayed. I went the ps route first because all the therapist told me that would be best for her. They could not have been more wrong. She had a hard time retelling what had been read or getting the point I would say of things until she really learned the narration skills that HOD teaches. Plus the one on one attention you can give even as an untrained teacher is far superior to what a trained teacher can give when they are dealing with several children who have very different special needs. I found even in her special ed my dd was lost with the other children who had issues that were nothing like hers. I really recommend hsing and HOD as mom who also has a child with language and reading delays. It has been wonderful for us. Praying you find the best for your child.

[spidermansmum]

Hi
I have a 7 yo son diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder.We tried PS-because all the professionals we came in contact with were so certain that PS was the way to go.I can answer without a shadow of doubt they were wrong.In those 8 months at PS- my DS lost skills.I sat in on one of DS' PS Math lessons.It broke my heart to watch him.Firstly let me explain some of my son's difficulties.My DS has ASC- I think its the high functioning/Aspergers end of the scale.He was tested by aSpeech And Language Therapist-who specialised in children with ASC.The SALT discovered that although he scored 7+ ahead of his actual age on expressive language-he scored- 3 years behind his actual age in processing what was spoken to him.Infact he can grasp about 3-4 key words in any given sentance.Because of his autism ,he spends the whole time decoding the words.Speech is decoded usually in seconds-for my son this can take minutes.
So there I was in his PS math lesson and the teacher starts the lesson with.."Now todays math lesson is going to be a bit different from our usual math lesson,we are going to do counting in fives followed by some individual work in groups-but for now weare going to do group work and count in fives" that was one sentance and DS sat there confused .Then she had them counting quietly and DS caught on and joined in.Then she said "Right now we are going to do 10 divided by 2 so imagine we have 10 and we are going to share them between two people so write your sum and answers on your whiteboards" DS had no clue-he saw a sum witten on the blackboard and copied that- .Everyone had to hold their boards up.She saw that DS had the wrong answer-made him copy the kid next to him.She called out another sum-again in the same loooong way.Ds again copied the exact same sum on the blackboard.This got repeated .It broke my heart.It was like I had sent him to a school that only a foriegn language or sent a deaf child to school where they refused to use sign language.Had she written the sum on the blakboard,or just said 10 divided by 5-he would have been able to do it-but sadly her lesson plan didnt do those.I can imagine its hard with 30+ children with varying needs and abilities.
At home -I use HOD BLHFHG .Yesterday he said to me-as he grasped the math concept-"You explained it so well -I understand it" and did some extra pages because he grasped it and wanted to.THOSE DAYS are rare ,and precious...Dont fall into the trap of measuring your success as a homeschooler with your childs ability or progress .I have a few tricks I use withmy DS.we use lego or props .When we did thornton burgess,I knitted up a bear, a rabbit and he acted out parts of the story as I read