Whew! Second day was rough and soooo loooooong!!!

[Natreez]

Well we had our first day on Friday and omitting math had a fairly quick day. However I don't know what happened as today we had our second day and it was horribly loooooong!! I finally had to wrap things up without having him do his individual work in English, Math, or the Science drawing because of piano lessons but girls...I don't know what I'm gonna do, I only have one child that I'm teaching so I'm not quite sure what the problem is??? Also he seems to look starry-eyed when I'm reading the American History book and then I have to go back over and explain what I just read in more simpler terms. Suggestions?? Thanks!!

Natreez

[my3sons]

We've all had days that were tough, but I've found more often than not, they help me see things we need to work on. Some insights I've walked away from on bad days...
- I didn't have a schedule that made sense
- I didn't stick to a schedule
- I talked on the phone, did laundry, answered emails, wrote cards... instead of sticking to homeschooling
- my ds lacked the habit of diligence
- my ds needed to know what was expected of him
- my ds needed the timer set and a consequence for dawdling
- I needed to intersperse "recess" playtime for my boys throughout the school day
- I needed to do my more teacher-intensive subjects when dbaby was napping
- I needed to start school on time
- I needed to be patient for my sons to grow into the schedule
- my ds didn't have the habit of listening well to read-alouds
- we needed to move around a lot between rooms, tables, couches, etc. (I have 3 sons)
- I needed to quit waiting for the "perfect" lesson to happen and sometimes just move on if it didn't go just like I thought it should
- my ds needed an attitude adjustment
- I needed an attitude adjustment
- I picked too hard of an HOD level and needed to go to half-speed for awhile

Anyway - you get the picture! I've had a lot of things I've figured out from having a rough day. They can actually be blessings in disguise sometimes. I know that HOD's curriculums are awesome, so it helped me to think through what was really going on that I could change - or help my dc change - for the better. Maybe my list - which I tried to be painfully honest about - may help you as you are mulling over your rough day. Sometimes it's just a few simple changes that make rough days go away, and sometimes its perseverance over greater time that sends those rough days packing! HTH!

In Christ,
Julie

[Natreez]

Wow Julie! You really hit the nail on the head. I've had some time to mull things over a bit this evening and really think about where I went wrong. Here are my thoughts as well as a few guilty confessions ... first, I need to remember that in addition to doing an entirely new curriculum with a totally different schedule, we are also doing many new subjects that he's never done before. Which by the way might I add is one of the things that I totally loved about HOD...its just so meaty!!! We have never done any formal grammar, poetry, art, vocabulary, geography, cursive, or a formal reading program prior to this year. Now granted these aren't all always done at the same time, it's still all very new to my ds and I should remember to be respectful of his need to adjust to the newness of it all.

Second, I tend to have a habit of wanting to "add" to the curriculum. How funny in Day 1 we are supposed to simply read the poem. Of course, I didn't think it was enough and tried to decipher the poem as well. Fast forward to Day 2 and there Carrie has it all so beautifully laid out. I really need to just "trust" the program that I've spent soooo much time researching and feel is 100% what I was looking for.

I need to not be so picky about perfection. (I believe I got this from your list Julie.) What an eye-opener it was when I realized how critical I was of my son while doing art today. "...Hold the paintbrush straight up. Don't push to hard. Not to much paint. Opps...watch those lines. No, don't rub your paintbrush into the paper..." Whew! I wouldn't blame my dear son if he never wants to paint another picture with mommy again. I can see that I need to just relax in some areas. (Especially art which should be a form of creative self-expression not creative mommy-expression.)

Also, I was reading a post from Carrie to another mom having some first week challenges and bits and pieces of what she said really stuck with me... "Don't tweak the schedule so your kids can't find a rhythm. Challenges happen in public school too. Make adjustments in the first week then try to settle in and make it work. Consistency is key and starting anything new requires an adjustment period." Wow!! I literally slapped myself upside the forehead and sighed a sigh of relief after reading this and thinking, "So maybe its not me...it happens everywhere, even in public schools!! " Also I really liked the way Carrie put it that our kids have to find a rhythm.

I am so excited about this year and HOD...and am so thankful to have you ladies here on the board to bounce ideas and thoughts or even to just vent a little until I can regroup and refocus as I did today. Thank you so much for allowing me to get my frustration of my chest so that I feel prepared to start tomorrow fresh and ready!!

Carrie, you truly have a gift with how you word things. Thank you for your powerful words. I know they weren't meant for me, however I appreciate you allowing this message board for times as this when during our frustrations we need someone to reach out to. There is always someone on the board here willing to listen and/or help.

Natreez

[GingerN]

Thank you ladies for these insightful messages! They are helpful to everyone. I had a small tip for *art* time woes...been there, done that! Now the girls and I just sat down last Friday for a drawing lesson with oil pastels. They are all trying so hard to be artistic, and yet my tendency is to make 'suggestions' for them to improve. So that lesson I made a change and didn't say one word unless it was a praise. Then, since I can't even draw a straight line, I proceeded to draw the ugliest picture you can imagine! It was supposed to be a night scene, and I chose an outdoor theme with mountains and a lake and a tall evergreen. I tried my best but it ended up looking like a real mess. The girls started giggling and then we were all laughing at mom's attempt. When I drew a tiny space ship flying over my ugly mountain, we all just laughed so hard. Of course they wanted to display my picture along with theirs in the hall 'art gallery'...My point is that, sometimes, it is a good thing to humble oneself before your dear children. It's good to remember the lightness and joyfulness of our children. It was a good experience and everyone was happy. Blessings~
Ginger

[my3sons]

Oh Natreez - I'm so glad something else good came from all of my mess-ups in homeschooling! I continue to make some of these mistakes over and over again. One of my most common problems is to exactly what you described with the art lesson. Thank you so much for sharing that - I need to keep lightening up on things of that nature. Carrie is so wonderful with words - and she is so right, I remember the same problems in public school too. Finding that "rhythm" seems to take time, but once we hit is it's usually smoother sailing. Here's to us finding our rhythm! I'd cheers you with an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper if I could! Have a Wonderful Wednesday!

In Christ,
Julie

[Kathleen]

Julie, thanks for your great list! It is indeed helpful. (I don't think it takes long to make all those mistakes. I think I've managed to hit about all of them in the last year. )

Natreez, you hang in there! We've had good days, great days, and "these children are for sale" days so far in the last month. THey're getting better and better, and we're honestly loving our time with school. I totally agree that our perspective and expectations can make a huge difference with our school days with our kids, too.

I think that just in parenting in general, kids go through spurts where they need more discipline - for whatever it is they choose to see if they can get away with. Our issue recently has been being disrespectful and arguing when corrected. This obviously can bleed over into school and has led to time being added to our day to deal with these heart issues. (I'm also learning to have more patience when the day doesn't get to go "my way"... That would fall under the "mom needing and attitude adjustment", right Julie? And it can be oh so hard not to let my son "push my buttons" with his behavior...and interruptions from the younger 2 when we're already behind...) Anyway, I've had to look at this many times in the last year when times like this have popped up, and I have to say that I'm really thankful that I get to be with my children when they're acting like this and need discipline. I have the privilege to lead them to deal with their sin and point them to God. I'd still have these same issues to deal with and correct if they went to school somewhere else, I just wouldn't have as much time in the day to do it.

Hopefully that makes sense....I just noticed that my kids decided to turn on the hydrant outside, and it's NOT warm enough for a water fight...So, I need to go!

Kathleen

[water2wine]

Oh my goodness it is so easy to go off on tangents with HOD. She just leads you down these great paths and the temptation is to just skip down them a little farther. I think you got some great advice. From a more is more and more is better girl like myself my advice is do it exactly as written for a few weeks before you add anything else. It is really worth finding your groove with HOD first and just trusting it for what it is before you decide you want more.

This year we we changed math and LA but of course not HOD. Anyway this year I know HOD is perfect for us and my kids know it there will be no adjustment for them there at all but knowing how well it flows I knew I had to learn the Math and the LA and work out all those bugs. So we actually started all that this week and are trying to get our flow there then we will add HOD to it next week. I am so glad we did this because just looking at it alone was a perfect way to get a schedule with it that will not mess up HOD when we start next week. So for you I am suggesting the reverse. Maybe just focus on the HOD as it is with nothing else doing only what is there and not taking any longer strolls on things than are actually there. Eventually what you are going to find is what I have, all the great ideas you have Carrie had too and took care of them for you. I have pretty much stopped wondering because she is so good at making things all connect and flow.

It's a great program and there is freedom to add other things but I think just get a feel for what is really there before you add stuff if you decide to do that. I know once you find your groove you will love it.

[Carrie]

Natreez,

I'm so glad that you were able to find something that helped in the comments I made about starting a new year! The ladies are doing a great job of encouraging and uplifting you as well. It just takes time to hit your stride, and I know when we start our school year at our house (soon), I'll have similar sentiments! Just hang in there, your kiddos will get into a rhythm, and you'll almost forget how interesting these first few weeks were!

Blessings,
Carrie