OT - do you MAKE your children tithe?

[tbarr12]

My 11.5 yo dd has a pet-sitting business, and is starting to make a little money off of it. I have talked to her about tithing (which we always make them do with their allowance), but she is resistant to it. My husband doesn't want to make her - he feels that she should WANT to do it, and do it from her heart. I am unsure how I feel - at first I told her she had to, but then the response was so disheartening that I decided it would be better for her to want to. But today I heard a mom I respect at church say that she makes her children tithe out of every penny that they get.

I was just wondering what any of you out there do about this. I know this is not on the HOD topic, but I find the wisdom on these boards so graceful, encouraging, and godly that I wanted to get some input. Thanks again.

[arstephia]

No, I do not MAKE them. It is something they need to grow in understanding in so they see it as an offering and not an obligation of man. I want them to give from the heart not the head (as in hearing me say, "You MUST tithe.") so it is their own conviction and not out of guilt. Same with so many other decisions they will need to make. We talk about things and search scriptures so they can develop their understanding. That said, I couldn't help but smile when I saw my 13yo put an offering in the plate today. (He has mowed some yards.) He is beginning to take his walk seriously, and that isn't something I can make him do. I guess we take it with the approach of encouraging them to and teaching them why it is important. When they were little and wanting money from my purse to put in, we gave it to them and we still do for the 6yo, but we teach her why she is giving. Maybe just more conversation/teaching moments will help you with your child so she has a fuller understanding of what you are asking and why.

[sharonb]

My children are younger than yours, but yes, we do have them tithe. I think "make" is a strong word; we direct them. They all have a piggy bank where they put money they receive (for birthdays, coins they find on the ground, etc). Once every several months we count up the money in the piggy banks, and 10% goes to church. The rest goes to their savings accounts at the bank. Sometimes they receive birthday money where the giver specifically says they want them to go pick out a toy or something. In cases like that, they immediately tithe 10% on that money and then spend the rest. I'm sure as they get older we will change how we do things; I imagine we'll have them tithe on money as it is received rather than waiting until we are ready to put it in the bank. We'll also establish a % we want them to save. At this point they do very little spending of the money they receive. We encourage them to save it.

Our goal is to make tithing a habit. Yes, we want it to be a willing act of worship, but we also see the need to train them from an early age. I was taught to tithe from a very early age, and it's just something I've always done; I've never considered it to be optional. Dh and I make sure the tithe is our top priority when he gets paid, and let me tell you, the Lord has blessed us abundantly!

[flydena]

We also direct our children to tithe (once they have a job). My younger children do not do this yet, because they do not make any money (besides gifts they receive and we do not have them tithe on the gifts). My son (13), though, mows lawns. He started last spring and we set up an account for him. Ten percent is tithed, ten percent is "saved - not to be touched" and the rest he can save or spend as he pleases. He chooses to save, mostly, which I'm very grateful for. I've tried to teach my children that what we have doesn't really belong to us to begin with....it's all on loan to us from God, we are just His stewards. This is true...even to a non-believer. So, especially for a family that chooses to follow God, I feel it is important to develop a HABIT of giving. Obviously it is important to develop a love for the Lord and a willingness to give from the heart. I'm not sure how I would feel if I had a child that seemed resistant to this. We may have to deal with that when it comes to the next one in line for making money. She is our "spender." I'm not sure how she will feel about tithing, but she is also a giver when it comes to being a servant, so we will see. She already knows how the account has been set up for her brother, though, so I think it will be ok. Especially since they do have the option to do WHATEVER they want to with 80% of the money. It's only 20% that is not theirs to spend. Maybe if you present the idea that all that is left she has a choice with, it would help? Hope you can come to a decision that will work for your family on this. I'm not going to say that our way is the BEST way, it's just what we've decided for our family, and so far it is working.

[elizawill]

tithing is not an option currently, but i really hate to say we "make them" because they aren't arguing with me about it, ykwim? my kids are younger though - only 9 & 7. honestly, if it came to a point that they did not want to tithe their own money and it was becoming an argument between us, i don't think i would force the issue. i would definitely talk to them about it, but i'm not sure that i would make them tithe. my husband and i set an example with tithing, giving, and charity. we currently expect our kids to clear out their closets and toys and give things away, but if for some reason they really refused - i'd probablly use that opportunity as a learning experience rather than a hill to die on. i think tithing would be similar, and i might not force the issue - but simply pray God could use it to to grow my child up. anyway, that's my 2 cents.

[vtbowman]

What about encouraging her to find a cause or ministry that she can use a portion of her money to support. It would encourage her to give to something outside of herself while still supporting the Lord's work. Maybe an organization that helps kids.....she could use her money to purchase and donate school supplies, pajamas or shoes for local kids.....or commit to funding her own shoeboxes for Operation Christmas Child. Just a thought.

[raceNzanesmom]

At 11, yes. However, my 18 y/o (tomorrow) is encouraged to, but it's his choice. Has been for a couple years.

[my3sons]

We have our dc tithe the money they make from working "jobs". We put the rest of that money in the bank for college. We have just started giving our dc a quarter a day for completing all of their chore chart successfully. We do not have them tithe from these earnings, but let them spend that small amount as they wish. I will say that I did not tithe until I became an adult, and it was honestly very hard to begin to do it at that point. I think it is much easier if dc learn that this is what you do from an early age. I have come to view all our gifts as coming from the Lord, including money, so giving a portion of it back to Him is just giving Him back a small portion of what He has graciously given us. I also believe firmly that He blesses that. I share these thoughts with our dc constantly, and have tried to be a better example than I used to be by doing it consistently myself with a cheerful spirit. That's my "2 cents" on tithing!

In Christ,
Julie