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I'm homeschooling my 8.5 dd and 12.5 ds. I've been focusing on history and literature and while neglecting a true Godly focus. My dh has fallen way short of being a spiritual leader in our home and he has many personal and family problems that are affecting his relationship with God and our son. My dh is probably more of a hinderance to my son's Godly character development than anything else. It saddens me so very deeply.
My ds said that he really isn't sure if he believes in God. I came to the stark realization that I only have a few more years with my ds and I NEED to help him focus on God and to become a Godly man. My ds has no Godly men in his life.

Skill wise he is mostly CtC, but the bible study and focus on becoming a Godly man in RtR is drawing me in. Please pray that I hear God in my decision and that I choose whatever He leads me to so that my son is lead to Christ. I need to sell my Sonlight curriculum so that I can purchase HOD, there is no way I can afford it unless I do. I just feel so desperate for direction. Please, please pray for us.

Ann

Oh, Ann. My heart goes out to you. I have prayed for you and will continue to lift you and your family up in prayer. You can have hope knowing that "the LORD's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither his ear heavy, that it cannot hear" and He can "restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten". (Sorry for the verses taken a wee out of context -- my point is, He is a great and merciful and generous God -- we can hope big hopes and pray big prayers).

Praying for the Lord's guidance in your decision. Raising Godly children IS the most important part of their education. Also praying your ds will open his heart to the truth.

Ann, I feel your hurt in your post. I'm so sorry. I have prayed that God will direct you.

As far as placement, if skillwise your ds places in CTC, then it probably wouldn't be a good idea to try to do RTR. It would be too frustrating for you both. You could try working through Boyhood and Beyond on your own or perhaps just get the RTR guide just for the purity study. I'm wondering where does your dd place and were you planning on doing two separate guides or combining? I couldn't help but think on the wonderful year of building godly character that we've had in Bigger this year. It's been a wonderful study of people who had strength of character and perseverance. Each week we studied a godly character trait and looked at how that person or persons that we were studying exhibited it or didn't and discussed how we could apply it in our lives. That character study was such a blessing to us here. I know there are more treasures like this that await us in future guides too and hopefully someone who has done all of the guides can share with you some of the wonderful godly character that was developed through them. No matter which guide you end up in, you will find a very Christ centered focus always pointing our dc to Christ.

Mater - thank you for the verses! They made me cry, but also gave me some comfort.

PJ - My dd is 8.5 and places in Preparing and CtC, but closer to Preparing. Her reading skills are definitely at the CtC level. I printed out the CtC sample and it really spoke to my heart. My ds was just asking me about the Flood last week. My ds is my priority right now and I can only afford one guide and set of books. I think my dd could handle CtC, but I'd have to modify some of the writing and written narrations for her.

Thank you all for your prayers! It lightens my heart and lifts my spirit to know we are being prayed for. I NEED to find a church. I'm just painfully shy and introverted, so the thought of walking into a strange church is right under having a root canal.

Ann

Ann,
Perhaps you could actually put them both in Preparing? It gives a sweep of history beginning with Creation all the way to modern times (includes the flood), is for ages 8-10 with Extensions for ages 11-12 so that you don't miss the skill-building for your daughter while the Extensions will add challenge for your son with higher-level reading and written assignments (the schedule and directions for the Extensions are in the appendix of Preparing). HOD suggests that for combining, it is better to start with the younger and "beef up" for the older child so that the skill progression is not lost for the younger. This way you would buy: Economy Package, Science Adder, Basic Package (unless you need to economize, these books meant to be read aloud by you to the students are wonderful as are the follow-up activities), Self-Study Extension package for your older child, Self-Study Deluxe History Package for your younger, Drawn Into the Heart of Reading-one teacher book and a separate workbook for each child-you might want to start them both in 4/5, or try 6/7/8 for your older if he is able to work on his own (or your own reading program), Rod and Staff Grammar-it is advanced so usually recommended to start one or two levels below the child's grade (or your own grammar program), Singapore Math-go to the Singapore Math site for a printable placement test and have each child complete it independently-expect them to place 1 to two levels below their grade (or your own math program), and the Psalms CD. I know it sounds like a lot, but the HOD guides get it all in and do it in such an organized and easy to follow way, in 4 days a week and about 4.5 hours a day once everyone gets used to the routine! All the guides are wonderfully Christ-centered, and your children will receive much character training.
My heart also goes out to you, and I will be praying for your family.

I'm agreeing with Lourdes here. I was thinking about Preparing for you too because of Grandpa's Box. We haven't done Preparing yet and I haven't read all of Grandpa's box yet, but I know it covers the whole story of redemption. From what I've seen of Preparing it really emphasizes God's hand in history. I can't think of a better way to help someone see how real God is. With Preparing you could combine your dd and ds just using extensions and on the level basics to have it as his level. It would be easier for you to do it this way than try to water down CTC for your dd. Have you read through Carries sticky at the top of the main board A Series of Posts on Common Questions? She explains her philosophy there about combining. All of the comments I've read from ladies here about Preparing have been glowing often times they are citing it as their favorite year of all. It's something to ponder.

Praying for you to. A good church might just really make a big difference. I understand the shy thing. I battled that for many years! What helps me the most is to put ALL of my focus and prayer to whoever I am with. Focusing my heart on how I can help bless or serve them has really changed me a lot.

I also wanted to agree w Lourdes. HOD works the very best when we place our kiddos exactly where they are at. If you need to combine its usually better to go below and "beef it up" with the extensions. All of the guides are so Christ-centered. It will minister to your sons heart. Preparing is meant to help kiddos ease into independence. I am not sure how independent your children are working? That also is a key factor in placement. Preparing begins at Creation and addresses some questions about the flood, dinosaurs, etc. It weaves Biblical history with world history very well. If you do go with Preparing - it just means you have something to look forward to next year!

God is so faithful and I will trust Him with you as you seek Him for these situations.

Mercy

I don't want to lose sight of my main focus and that is my ds and leading him to Christ. I have enough curriculum to use with my dd, so I'm not worried about combining her. I HAVE looked at Preparing, but I'm really worried that I will lose my son's interest with a lot of the books. We've read "A Child's History" and he hated it, so I'm afraid to even try it again. He's read many of the books in Preparing, in the basic, science and extension packages. I know HOD takes the books to new depths, but I feel he will look at them and just set his mind on the fact that we've already read them and he won't want to reread them. He picks up on skills quickly, but he is always resistant at first. He really loves reading and the biggest turn off for him will be the level of some of the books in Preparing.

For some reason, when I read the first 4 days of the guide for CtC I almost cried. I just feel strongly that ds and his needs have to come before combining. Dd will be okay with SOTW, MOH, SL books, "Who Is God" from Apologia and her math and LA and copywork. Does that make sense?

Hi again,
I will pray for direction for you. It sounds like ctc would be perfect for your son. I am sure Carrie or Julie will pop on and help here.

It absolutely makes sense. If you have your things for your dd, then go with what your heart is telling you for your son. I uncombined my children a few years ago and I have seen major growth in both of them; a temperance in the negative qualities of my oldest dd and a blossoming of personality in my second dd. Their personal relationship has grown and they are great friends. God was calling me to separating them in school and I am so glad I heeded that call. I encourage you to follow His leading and trust Him for the outcome.

In Christ,
Jess

You said you were drawn to RtR because of the focus on becoming a Godly man. However, if your ds is not saved, CtC would probably be the place to start. I haven't used those guides yet, but I attended a workshop by Ken Ham at convention last month (Genesis: Key to Rebuilding the Foundation in Family and Culture) Creation is really the place to start when wanting to reach someone with the Gospel. Carrie took that approach in LHFHG. We did that this year. She started at the very beginning. By the time a child is finished with that guide, they can understand they are sinners and their need for a Savior. There have been many testimonies of children coming to Christ while doing LHFHG. We not only need to understand the love of God, but we need to understand that God is a just God and there are consequences for sin. That is learned by beginning at Creation. So, for your son, I would recommend beginning at CtC and bathing him in prayer that he would see his need of salvation. That is the first step to becoming a Godly man. Then RtR can help to bring growth after conversion. Also, finding a good fundamental, Bible-believing church would be very important. Your testimony can help to win your husband and also your son. If you could find one with a good youth outreach, maybe your son would get involved. HTH Praying for your family.

psreit wrote:You said you were drawn to RtR because of the focus on becoming a Godly man. However, if your ds is not saved, CtC would probably be the place to start. I haven't used those guides yet, but I attended a workshop by Ken Ham at convention last month (Genesis: Key to Rebuilding the Foundation in Family and Culture) Creation is really the place to start when wanting to reach someone with the Gospel. Carrie took that approach in LHFHG. We did that this year. She started at the very beginning. By the time a child is finished with that guide, they can understand they are sinners and their need for a Savior. There have been many testimonies of children coming to Christ while doing LHFHG. We not only need to understand the love of God, but we need to understand that God is a just God and there are consequences for sin. That is learned by beginning at Creation. So, for your son, I would recommend beginning at CtC and bathing him in prayer that he would see his need of salvation. That is the first step to becoming a Godly man. Then RtR can help to bring growth after conversion. Also, finding a good fundamental, Bible-believing church would be very important. Your testimony can help to win your husband and also your son. If you could find one with a good youth outreach, maybe your son would get involved. HTH Praying for your family.

I agree! After looking at the Guide for CtC, I feel that is where my ds should start.

My dh is saved (only the Lord knows for sure), he was even on the leadership team at our church years ago. Our church was a small Vineyard Church, but has since dissolved. I'm questioning his salvation in my heart. He doesn't spend time in prayer, he hasn't for a few years now and he has just turned into a very mean and angry person.

Thank you for your prayers!

I am so sorry for your situation. I think CTC may not only speak to your son's heart, but comfort yours as well. It is a year especially saturated with God's word due to the time period.

Ann,
Considering you have other curricula you would be happy to use with your daughter, then focusing on your son only CTC does sound like the best placement. I am using it now with my daughters ages 11 and 13, and the Genesis study alone has fueled some wonderful talks about God and His plan for mankind's redemption. Every subject points to God as Creator-if we don't know Him as Creator, it is hard to know Him as Redeemer.
In this case, you would want the CTC Economy Package, Science Adder, ONE of the three Basic Package options (unless you need to economize, these read-alouds are really great), Drawn into the Heart of Reading teacher book and student book level 4/5 or 6/7/8 depending on his independence (or your own reading program) Rod and Staff Grammar and Singapore Math (or your own in these areas), Write With the Best (or your own writing program), the Philippians 2 CD, and if you want the Illustrated Family Bible (or his own Bible).
Praying for you still as you plan for the coming school year.