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Okay...I just have to know...

Does anyone else have a child who will be in Bigger next Fall who is 10? My son will be 11 next February, about the middle of next school year. I KNOW this should not matter, but I just get so bent out of shape when I see others talking about their children in CTC or RTR who are 11 or 12. I am just like, how far behind are we??? Really, I know this should not be a big issue, but I am thinking, "Is something wrong with my son, because I just don't think he could handle anymore than Beyond plus DITHOR, Math 3, and LA 3 at this point. In my mind, Beyond plus all the other is a VERY full day for him. Is it me or him? Or is it just fine where we are?

Guess I would just like a little extra reinforcement today. My oldest doesn't particularly LIKE "doing school" anyway, and he is very strong willed and somewhat of a moody type, so I feel like after him being in school these last 2 years, he got the mentality of disliking school engrained in his mind. But with Beyond, he has thrived and loves to listen to the stories and loves to read now.

I know, I am falling into the comparison trap... Just, please send encouragement my way today, my friends...thank you!

tnahid wrote:... But with Beyond, he has thrived and loves to listen to the stories and loves to read now.

Hello and I hope this msg finds you encouraged! The above statement says it all.... If he is finally at a point where he is enjoying listening to stories and likes school and is thriving then you know you're doing the right thing! Praise the Lord. You might look at the thread called HOD testimonies. There was one mom whose son finished preparing after having some learning problems and was so overwhelmed when he finished Preparing that he clutched it to his chest... Oh goodness, that just tore through me. When your child, especially our sons, who are so targeted at ps not to enjoy school, knowing that teachers dislike a high ratio of boys in their class,etc. and their little spirits just plummet, you know the Lord is turning things around when you can say, "he has thrived and loves to listen."

Your DS sounds a lot like my DD. She has always met school with resistance...often leading to temper tantrums and tears. She turns 9 this summer and we'll be using Bigger next fall...and hopefully SM 3a. It's so hard not to compare with other HSers (or PSers), but I feel that placing her slightly "behind" has been a huge boost for her education. Since we started HOD, I've seen a huge improvement in her attitude...it's far from perfect, but it's so much better.

I guess I don't have any advice, but I know how you feel.

I agree with Laura. The Lord is really working things out for your son. It takes a while to decompress after coming home from public school. I bet the extra time will be just what he needs and he'll probably make up for it down the road. We shouldn't really compare, but we all do.
If it makes you feel better, my two oldest sons are still working on Bigger. They are 9 and 10 (he'll be 11 in April and still working on Bigger). We're only on Unit 14 because things slowed down after my daughter was born. I basically had them doing math and language arts only. My goal is to finish Bigger by the end of this school year - it might be mid-summer! So that we can start Preparing in the fall. And even with that, he'll be on the high end for that unit. I kept thinking also that he should at least be in CTC. But you know, ds9 has eye-tracking/processing issues and struggles with reading and writing, and ds10 is not motivated to read fiction and/or write, so here we are. He loves to read and write for his model railroading hobby, but that's another story. On a positive note, they both love HOD and learn so much. I have to remember it's not a race. They need what they need.
Be encouraged. "We know that God works everything together for good, for those who love God and are called according to this purpose." Rom. 8:28
Kristen

you're not alone! my daughter will be using bigger next year too. she'll be 10 in early october (in 4th grade). although she would probably do well in another level, i specifically chose bigger so that my two kids can stay together (that's my main reason in switching to HOD). my little boy will only be 7 1/2 & in grade 2 - so bigger is perfect for him. i bought the extension pack for my daughter & have been looking through it. it looks fabulous! i will make a few minor adaptions - but it looks very age appropriate & definitely will hold her attention! she will be on level for math & language arts and we will stay with our current curricula for those subjects. i also will use dictation plus in lieu of HOD dictation, as it looks too easy for my daughter. otherwise, i will only tweak a little here and there & make minor adaptions as we go along. anyway - just wanted to say that you're not alone

Sorry, typo......."We know that God works everything together for good, for those who love God and are called according to His purpose." Rom. 8:28

I am sorry you are feeling discouraged. I think that a big part of homeschooling is meeting your children where they are and building that amazing foundation that will last them through their lifetimes. They don't have to "compete" with anyone else because they are individuals! Praise God for our ability to do this for our children.

Don't buy into the comparison trap. My one of my best friends is using Bigger with her 10 yo - she'll turn 11 in the fall. She is doing it with her 8yo together. It is just a good fit for their learning style and for her child's interest. My 10 yo is finishing Preparing this year. Next year another best friend is using Preparing with her 7th grade son -12 turning 13 mid year. The topics, reading levels, amount of workload, etc. are all factors. Just do what you feel is best so your child can develop a love for learning and a heart for God.

Tina, it is so difficult sometimes, not to fall into the comparison trap...and as our children get older, have those panic moments of "Am I doing the right thing?" "Is he behind?" "Have I adequately prepared him for the future?" I do it myself sometimes.

The truth is, you are giving your ds something far better than being on target with someone else's academic schedule, you are giving him the solid foundation of Christ. Then, you are teaching him the skills necessary to be a life long learner. I know that it may seem like your ds is behind, but in truth, if he is where God wants him, he is right on target. You are a great mom to be so concerned about his education! And, to allow him to grow into the skills that he will need in the future - not just for future guides, but for life - is giving him a gift that goes beyond academics! I am thrilled that you could say he has thrived. Praise God that He is restoring to him the joy of learning! And, may the Lord encourage your heart today, that you are doing His will and preparing your son for His purposes!

One question I try to ask myself regularly, is not whether ds is where his peers are, but "Is he making consistent progress?" If I can answer "yes" to that question, then I move on. If I can't, then I look at what we are doing and try to fine tune where it needs it. It helps me to keep my eyes on what I am doing and not look at everyone around me - I fail, at this sometimes, though . To be honest, from what you posted, I would be celebrating at the consistent progress ds is making! He sounds like he is moving forward consistently & with a better attitude than he started! WOOWHOO!!

Tina, your son is making progress and loves to listen to the stories and read! Please don't think there is anything wrong with him or with you. My middle daughter is 13 and will be 14 before she finishes CTC. My youngest is 11 going on 12 and will be nearly 13 by the time she finishes CTC. But it is the right placement for both of them! Both of them spent some time in public school and came home loathing learning, But the sparkle is returning to both their eyes. They are as different as night and day. Keri loves math, science, and writing but would rather not read if she could avoid it . Tamara devours books quickly and loves to write stories, but is allergic to math and grammar Homeschooling with HOD is soooo wonderful because you are FREE to customize it by finding the level that meets your kids needs, rather than trying to bend your kids to fit a curriculum! Curriculum should be a tool, a means to an end, not the end in itself. Be encouraged-you are doing great and so is your son! The growing love of learning alone is a priceless gain!

Tina,
I totally understand. My dd is in Preparing and is 11. But, here's the deal, I started her last school year in Preparing when she fit the age range. It was our first time with HOD and anything Charlotte Mason. I should have put her in Bigger. Instead, after frustration on both her part and mine, I ended up going to something else. I didn't place her right, and placement is everything. I eventually came back to HOD. This year, now that my dd is a year older, the experience has been great. She has the same attitude issues as your ds. I think it's almost habit. Luckily habits can be changed. I see the negative attitudes of my dd slowly changing the longer we stick with HOD. My attitude has improved a ton too . It's easy to compare. I still sometimes catch myself doing it. I think if I had homeschooled from the beginning with HOD things might be a little different. However, my dd is getting a great, full education. Each program builds skills needed for the next, but is very full and complete in itself. I don't think 10 is too old for Bigger. In fact, I wish I would have done that with my dd. She would have gotten so much out of that program that would have helped her immensely with Preparing.

Thank you ladies! You are all just so amazing and filled with our Father's Spirit. I am so very thankful for each of your godly wisdom and encouragement. You are all right, I know it in my heart, and just reading these has helped me overcome this attack of fear. Bless you all!