heartofdakota.com

Hello all,

Well, DITHOR is going well with my 9 year old when I sit with him and discuss it all first. He just cannot comprehend it at all unless we sit down and go through it together orally first. Sometimes, this frustrates me, because I think (in my mind) that he is such a concrete, literal thinker. (My hubby is an engineer, and I sometimes think his head is as thick as a brick wall! ) Anyway, I guess I am concerned because he just doesn't seem to be on the "educational" level I think he should be (?) I guess I am learning to let go of certain fears and expectations of him. It is difficult, because my younger son is so far advanced for his age, that when I see my older one really struggling to "think" I get discouraged, or anxious I should say.

For example, he is already one year "behind" what his age is (he is on 3rd grade level because we put him in school one year behind his age). He is back home now and I am fighting this urge to push him back up to 4th, simply out of my own fear. I have very little support from my parents or others in homeschooling, so I really rely on strength and grace from the Lord, as well as other homeschoolers I know, and on this page.

I know we all learn differently, but that is pretty hard for me. I am your standard book-learner, and it is just frustrating at times to know that my oldest just "isn't!"

Also, one suggestion I have or question...Is there some way I can find out a synopsis of each of the assigned books in DITHOR without actually reading them myself? I am helping him with his stories, but I want to make sure that he is getting all the details, etc, right when he reads. He only reads aloud to me a portion (2-3 pages) of his assigned pages, so I don't always know for sure if what he is telling me is accurate. It would be helpful to have a summary of the story or an answer sheet to go along with the worksheet assignments in order to know what the story is really about throughout. Any thoughts on this?

Also, I was thinking WAY TOO FAR ahead about SAT's today and how my children would do on those if they don't ever take tests. I don't personally like tests at all, but I MUST not dwell on things that far off, I know. I must not let fear of the future rule me each day, but learn to let go and enjoy each day. It's just the constant battle to know if I am doing enough or helping them enough or if they are falling behind because of me. Thanks for any encouragement. I look forward to reading your godly counsel. It is always so good!

Tina

My 11 year old is a concrete thinker as well. She just doesn't get things. Has a tough time with comprehension. She spent wayyy to much time in 3rd grade. But as my mom says its a catch all grade that starts showing you your child's strengths and weaknesses. I have been thinking about your post.
Maybe look at alibris or a book review site that could tell you a short synopsis. Some libraries have book's as MP3's that maybe you could down load and listen too, or playaways or books on cd..

If he's really garbled or jumbled up in his narrations that might be a clue (hey maybe I should skim his book today). I would go slower and give him just a few pages at a time, (shorter books). The books are usually very short reads. but then don't ask me I tend to eat books in one bite. A child's chapter book is like an appetizer.

I often cling to a few things to help me with my "fearfulness" One is God is in charge he knows you can parent/teach your dc.
Two: Employers really could care less what school you went too.. it's are you teachable, and will you fit in, and who do you know.
Three: When they are 26, 36, 46 who really will care that they are a year behind... or that they got 400 on their SAT's I mean if wee gonna look ahead lets really look...

I have a son who is a grade behind where he could be age wise. We started him "late" because of a summer birthday. School is still hard for him. I understand your feelings. Sometimes it is hard for me to understand that as school-type learning comes easily to me. However, over the years I have learned that pushing him accomplishes nothing. I had to reorder his math this year because I thought another program might jump-start him a little. WRONG! My advise would be to keep him in the grade you have him in and just be consistent. This is how we get the best results. Our children are who God made them--wonderfully made (regardless of their math level!). Can you tell math is our struggle (smile).

Thank you so much for your comments. They are very helpful. I also got some encouragement from a retired schoolteacher today who said that her best students were the ones who were a year older than their grade level. She also held both her sons back and started them both a year later than they could have. They are both grown men now, one an ob/gyn surgeon and the other a high security computer programmer. Not too shabby for late starters!

Blessings,
Tina