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Seems like there is something in the air My 12 year old is saying "I don't care" when I point out to her she is behind on her online classes. She spends 5 to 6 hours and only gets 2 lessons done. She has an F in Gifted and Talented Literature, because she did not turn in a project on time, and now her second project is overdue, so she lost her chance to pass this semester. This is not because she cannot finish on time, she was doing better before. It is because she is deciding not to finish on time. My 11 year old is giving me a hard time on grammar. If I tell her to read the lesson to herself, she barely looks at the directions, meaning I have to make her do the written part over when she has done it wrong. This is even though I have her do almost half the lessons orally, and she was doing fine before. Then if I begin to explain, she cuts me off and says in annoyance "I know, I know!" This is wearing me down, any motherly wisdom? I am not responding to these behaviors with great patience

blessedmomof4,
I have no wisdom...but I am taking you to the One who does. May God grant you the wisdom you need today, along with the patience and joy to endure this latest trial. May He give you insight into how to deal with these issues and His strength to implement whatever measures are necessary. And, may He work in your dc hearts to give them cooperative spirits!

Will be looking forward to reading the wisdom of the other moms on this issue! They always have so much good experience and wisdom to share.

Blessings to you!!

Lourdes, I don't have much wisdom of my own to share with you, but I have been reading a book by John Rosemond called Parenting by the Book , Biblical wisdom for raising your child...and I can highly recommend it. I can insert that responding with great patience is not what she needs from you, and neither is less work. She should be expected to do her work and do it well as unto the Lord, and until she decides to do so, she should not be allowed to do anything she enjoys, and I mean anything...TV, computer, extra curricular classes, reading for pleasure...everything she enjoys, gone. Then those things should be added back in slowly as she chooses to change her attitude and work ethic. I have some dear godly friends who recommended this book to me after they had read it seeking help for their son who has extremely serious neurologal issues. Ben was sinning in the same ways your daughter is choosing to sin. Ben was not allowed to go to boy scouts, read for pleasure, go play outside, no computer play, TV or participate in the same things his brothers were doing for fun. Things were added back one by one as time passed with consistent behavior and everything has now turned around for him. It was hard for my friends to be consistent with this but Ben has done a 180.

Just thought I'd pass this on!

I requested the book at my library In the meantime, I prayed this morning. Keri and I had a talk. I let her know I expect her to catch up her work, that if she works extra on the weekend,she can catch up before it gets really out of hand. I told her if she didn't catch up before Thanksgiving, she would forfeit Thanksgiving vacation and have to work while the rest of the family is enjoying the holiday. She did catch up on Literature, which is the class she has an F in. I let her know she now needs to concentrate on Science and Social Studies, which are each one lesson day behind. I praised her for good grades in other subjects. My gut tells me something else is on her mind, because I came upon her crying twice today, but she wouldn't say what was wrong. She can be a moody person at times. I will keep praying.
As for Tamara, today went more smoothly. She was happy with her grammar lesson, as it was about writing friendly letters, and she took the opportunity to write one to her grandma in NY. She even addressed the envelope herself, rather than asking me to do it as she usually would, put a stamp on it, and took it to the mailbox I think Tamara is actually desiring more responsibility and independence. She enjoys the independent history and science assignments, and is getting along better with an independent math. She actually WANTED to try out different solutions to a problem

Lourdes - I'm glad you have had some good results already. I think you received good advice here. I have noticed that when my oldest has attitude problems, the youngers are soon to follow. Your oldest dd is the "lead horse" (as the Boyers say ), and has a special role in leading her siblings. It helped my oldest to explain this special responsibility to him. He wants to lead his younger brothers in a good direction. Likewise, it helped my middle ds to tell him he is leading our youngest (not sure what I'll tell our youngest). Also, privileges need to be recognized as such. They are earned. This includes bedtimes, free time, fun time, toys/games/ipods/tv time/movies/music, etc. They can be taken away and sometimes need to be so they are remembered to be privileges. Your Thanksgiving discussion was a good one - I'm glad you saw good results. I have come to believe that respect in the way dc talk to us is a must. I had my dc saying "I know, I know", just not answering me, or giving great sighs a few weeks ago. My oldest started it, and my middle ds was soon to follow. I finally hung a sticky note up on the cupboard. I told them for every time they did not respond "Yes, mom" in a cheerful voice when I told them to do something, they had 5 minutes earlier of a bedtime. For every time they did not complete all of their chores without being told, they lost their 30 minute computer time for the day. Two days of following through on this worked wonders. They can wear us down sometimes, can't they?!? But, we sometimes forget we have control of their day and that privileges are not a given. I hope you continue to see good results - but be strong, be firm - you are not alone in this struggle, but as homeschool parents, we have more options in our control to change bad habits into good habits. HTH!

In Christ,
Julie

I know I may come down as a harsh meanie when it comes to kids, discipline, and attitudes. BUT... I believe these attitudes do not Glorify God, and He has a clear prescription for that in His Word. It is the rod of correction.

Use it. It is effective, and His prescribed means to teach our children to Glorify Him in all things.

Bottom line, she is disrespecting you and our Lord by not doing her work as unto the Lord.

If the attitude of disrespect is allowed to continue, it will only grow greater.

What does your husband think?