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Ladies, I need some suggestions. My oldest 2 are combined in Res to Ref this year. Lately it seems it is a race to see who can get their schoolwork finished first, which means fighting over the guide, arguing over "start time" (not supposed to start school before 8:00 am to allow me time in the Word in the morning), etc. This also leads to occasional sloppy work. Mostly, I'm bothered because I know that they like what they're learning, but I feel like at times they're not fully enjoying it like they should because they are too busy hurrying through it. Please tell me someone else has experienced this. I wish my kids always thought to put each other first, but unfortunately that's not how it always go. Suggestions please! Thank you.

Maybe they can pool their own $ to purchase copies of fought over resources?

Oooh, good idea!!!

This is our situation too! My oldest two are also doing Res. to Ref. It has really helped to get them each their own guide, but other than that, they have to share everything. They are very competitive with one another, and there have been tears if one person starts ahead of the other, or if one girl feels like she's "behind" the other. Last year I think even a few pencils were thrown. It's probably our biggest obstacle (for these two) in homeschooling. I have had them do things over if their work is too sloppy. And we talk often about how it's better to try your best and have fun learning, then to get done super fast (which the "try your best" speech I have to be careful with, because they're also perfectionists). I wish I had ideas that would help with your children - hopefully it's encouraging to know that you are not alone!

Jessica,
Yes, it is encouraging to know my kids aren't the only ones. My two are such good buddies, really like best friends, so I get so frustrated when they act like that to each other!I also make my kids redo work when it is not done to full potential. Most of the time they do a great job, but I just hate that they might be missing out on actually enjoying something because they're too busy rushing through it! I have considered giving them a reasonable time in which they must be doing school work (say 2:00 pm for example). If they get done before that time, then they have to read or do something else educational, just so they realize they might as well take their time and work diligently. Then I'm also afraid of frustrating them if they truly have worked hard and are just done at a good time. Mostly I need to really pray over it I suppose...that God will change their hearts. Thank you for your response!

I'm thinking that if you applied Charlotte Mason's principle of NEVER accepting a single piece of sloppy work that this race might end. Maybe?

Even my DD in CTC has fallen prey to this for a little while. The sloppy work was partly my fault, I definitely wasn't checking over things like I should have been. I discovered once that my DD had skipped several things for about 3 units, and made her go back and do them all (over the course of the next week, not all the same day). I should have made checking over her work part of our meeting time together, and now I do, at least I do it regularly.

I guess with your kids I would have a little talk with them about how school is not a race or competition, it is an opportunity and they are really not making the most of it. Then I would try to separate them as much as possible. Give them blocks, so that one child has a certain set of books to work with for a while, while the other is using other books. Then switch. I'm not sure how easily that can be done, but that seems like something to try. I will also tell you, my DD has been much happier, and is doing much better, since I started having her do some of her work at night. It doesn't work every night, but with 2 boxes out of the way, and Storytime being the first box I do with her each morning (easy and fun), she is not so bent on rushing through everything. Her DITHOR project plus some of the history projects she actually gets to take some time on and enjoy. Her mom just needs to quit worry about the fact that she's spending hours on DITHOR

I hope you are able to work something out.

I highly recommend getting them each a guide. Even though my 2 are sharing the other resources and I have them scheduled to do different boxes at different times, not having their own guide would be very difficult. There is so much to read in each box and they need to keep referring to the guide throughout whatever they are doing. That would be frustrating to me as the student.

mrsrandolph wrote:I'm thinking that if you applied Charlotte Mason's principle of NEVER accepting a single piece of sloppy work that this race might end. Maybe?

I honestly almost "never" get sloppy work...HOD has really trained them well to be independent and they do work hard. I just wish they'd SLOW down...!

MelInKansas wrote:Even my DD in CTC has fallen prey to this for a little while. The sloppy work was partly my fault, I definitely wasn't checking over things like I should have been. I discovered once that my DD had skipped several things for about 3 units, and made her go back and do them all (over the course of the next week, not all the same day). I should have made checking over her work part of our meeting time together, and now I do, at least I do it regularly.

I guess with your kids I would have a little talk with them about how school is not a race or competition, it is an opportunity and they are really not making the most of it. Then I would try to separate them as much as possible. Give them blocks, so that one child has a certain set of books to work with for a while, while the other is using other books. Then switch. I'm not sure how easily that can be done, but that seems like something to try. I will also tell you, my DD has been much happier, and is doing much better, since I started having her do some of her work at night. It doesn't work every night, but with 2 boxes out of the way, and Storytime being the first box I do with her each morning (easy and fun), she is not so bent on rushing through everything. Her DITHOR project plus some of the history projects she actually gets to take some time on and enjoy. Her mom just needs to quit worry about the fact that she's spending hours on DITHOR

I hope you are able to work something out.

Thanks for your input! We have daily checklists for each subject (since I have 4 kiddos in school), and no one is skipping anything. I tried making their "schedules" so they work through things in an order in which they're not needing books at the same time. With 4 kids doing schoolwork, though, and a 3 year old, it is quite difficult to keep track of each kids' schedule and make sure they're doing everything in that order. Thankfully they are very independent workers and super responsible for 11 and 10 year old, but I just hope they're enjoying it and not just getting through it. This morning there was a short spat over the Shakespeare book and I stopped them immediately and warned them any more fighting over books would mean I'd take their hard-saved money and use it to buy another book so there'd be no reason for fighting. I also reminded them that when they think of one another as better than themselves (Phil 2:3), they shouldn't have any more issues. They very quickly solved the problem without another word. I was super thankful for that and believe we may be on the right track!

Nice job I love to use scripture also...it is living and active, and I want my kids to see the Word as the ultimate authority.

Good job of using Scripture to illustrate the Godly character qualities you are wanting in them! I can think of one easy way to separate the girls that would help you out too - have each of them have a playtime with each of your little ones while the other one works. For example, while Quinter is with Ainsley for 45 minutes (maybe reading her BHFHG Storytime and Grammar with her ), Gabry can do her RTR Reading about History and History Project. While Gabry is with Ainsley (maybe doing Ainsley's BHFHG's science reading and experiment with her), Quinter can do her RTR Reading about History and History Project. Other pairings such as this would work...

Quinter with Bryn; Gabry with Bryn (Rotating History Box, Independent History from RTR for each; whoever is with Bryn can teach something from LHFHG)
Quinter with Silas; Gabry with Silas (Science from RTR for each and Storytime unless you are reading that to them; whoever is with Silas each time can teach part of LHTH if you want)

I want to second them each having their own guide if they don't. I think that is extremely beneficial (I could not have shared with my dear sisters when it came to schoolwork like that back when ). Also, they can each do their own Bible Quiet Time at the start of the day. If one finishes early, she can help with breakfast. The other boxes are teacher-directed or semi-independent, so they'll more than likely finish about the same time as you are leading them. It sounds like they are the best of buddies often, so a few little tweaks like this will probably do the trick! Hope something here helps!

In Christ,
Julie

Julie, Thank you for taking the time to respond! I really appreciate your ideas and insight, and I will definitely implement some of those! Blessings to you!! -Meredith

I'm glad to have been of any help, and I sometimes find the best help is just the 'weekend!' I get refocused, refreshed, and jazzed up again for a new week with new mercies! Praise the Lord we don't have to be perfect, right? Nor our kiddos either! My best days start probably about a month into the year. That's one of the many wonderful blessings of HOD - the more the year progresses, the better both my children and I know the week's ins and outs, and then the fun really begins, while simultaneously...

time
begins
to
f
a
l
l
off the day. Keep pressing on - you're doing it! I can think of more than one time I've wished a few of my kiddos looked at school as a little bit MORE of a race - just to encourage you that there is probably a bright side to this 'trait' in your sweet girls. I have one who rarely glances at the clock and could work on creative projects especially allllllllllllllllllllllllll day until he glances at the clock and realizes everyone else is already done. Anyway, I hope you have a refreshing rejuvenating weekend, and we'll both get back to a new and exciting week again on Monday!

In Christ,
Julie