heartofdakota.com

Hello HOD.
I am looking for motivation, encouragement, input and advice. This is our first year homeschooling. Ds is 7 (8 in Sept), dd is 9 (10 in Sept) and dd just 3 in March. We used (loosely) BLHFHG this year for both dc. Our start was strong back in Sept. but then I don't know if it was the brutal winter in MN or first year learning curve. By January we were struggling to stay on task. We started a co-op in Jan. where dd took art, creative writing (disliked it) and spanish and ds took art, drama and science. The co-op was a blessing and I realized that I need that part of homeschooling so we continued that through the spring and just finished.

Well, I guess my concerns are that we are a little more than half way through Beyond at this point. When we are consistent I really enjoy it and the dc do to. In the beginning, ds complained daily about most writing so I backed off of that and tried other ways to get writing in. Then dd pushed back with Rod and Staff English so we slowed then stopped that too. Dd also struggled with the DITHOR student book so we stopped that too. They are both strong readers and thankfully enjoy reading.

So what did we do all year...read A LOT of books of their choice, read some read alouds together, math the majority of days and some kind of writing almost daily, co-op classes once a week, BLH in the beginning and then loosely since Jan.

I am wondering now, should we just keep going through the summer and finish both of them in BLH then move into Bigger with both or should we take the summer off then continue ds in Beyond and start dd in Bigger? Again, this is my first year, so I am looking for input from all of the more experienced. Thanks, I know this got a little long!

I guess that depends. Do you think you will be able to finish it up this summer, being only 1/2 way through now? It sounds like you have done a lot of good things, and your older one might be ready to move into Bigger by the Fall (have you looked at the placement chart again?). But I don't know, if it has been hard to finish Beyond with both of them, will you want to try to have two guides worth of material to get through in a day? Plus, back-to-back guides are not really recommended. It can be done, but it does require dedication especially in the earlier guides because it is a lot more work. Usually they recommend you keep them combined and add in extension work for the older one if they need it.

Those factors would indicate you should keep them combined. But if you are dropping the writing level for your younger one then that problem will only keep getting worse unless you work up his writing chops a little bit. There is more copywork and notebooking in Bigger Hearts. I assume your older one was doing R&S 2 just because she is older. Eventually you will want to have her finish it, but many people do it mostly orally which does make it go faster and I think makes the kids enjoy it a little more. My 9YO says R&S is her least favorite thing, so I started doing more orally, but I don't make it optional. Unless you are subbing in another grammar program I think it is really needed.

I would really encourage you to finish everything thoroughly. Each guide builds on the previous one and if you are skipping things then it won't work. DITHOR is hard to work in sometimes but it is also a very foundational study. I think in Bigger I really had to cut out extra/other stuff I was doing. We still do a weekly co op, but there is very little outside work for that, it's just attending each week. I wanted to be committed that if I was going to do this curriculum I was going to do it well, and therefore have my children reap the benefit of it. Now, we don't finish one guide per year either, mainly because of the co op, but I am okay with that. I know I will have to have a more concrete plan once we get closer to high school, but for right now, I am happy to have my kids where they need to be in the guides and take them at a reasonable pace for us. Again, I have just committed to do them completely, no matter what that takes. When my kids know it's not optional they will do it, mostly without grumbling. We skipped DITHOR one time and for about 3 days after my DD was asking if she could not do that. I made her do it at the park. Mean of me, I know.

I would agree with everything Melissa said. I think that with your kids, I would try and finish Beyond over the summer. And I would also add back in R&S and do most of it orally. And depending on how your kids are doing with writing at this point, I would start adding in daily copy work. This may seem boring but it really is needed to build up their hand muscles.

One thing that I found early on in my homeschooling journey was that I needed to set goals for schooling and to make the goals my priority. For me, I have only homeschooled so we have grown up from having very short days to now having much longer (only 4 hours long 4 days week is what I mean by longer) homeschooling days. When most moms first start out if they homeschool younger kids, they are only doing school for about an hour a day. But with your two kids, the 7 and 9 year old are obviously going to take more time than that And as a mom - it gets hard! This year, my oldest dd is finishing Preparing and this is the first year she has had a significant volume. Before, I could double up if I wanted to get done more quickly but I can't now! No doubling up because she would be over loaded. We also had to prioritize our day and week around school. We do a co-op once a week, we play sports, my kids are involved in AWANA (Bible memory club), my kids take music lessons, and my oldest sings and is in a play each year. I also work from home and have about 1 meeting a week. So we are the poster child for busyness. With that all being said, we have a daily scheduled and we stick to it like glue! Also, if we have things going on where we can't get school done for a week (like with my oldest dd - she was in a play and we took a week off for crunch week), then I plan for that. For me, because we are SO busy, I actually have a yearly schedule that lays out what I hope to accomplish and by when so that I know if I am track to achieve my goal. Not many people I know do this because they just don't worry about it . But organization has really helped me. And setting my priorities has also helped me.

I actually think you taking a year of relaxation was probably great for you. I know many people who pull their kids out of public school and they take a year to detox! I think your kids are probably feeling great from that. And since they are feeling so revitalized now, I think now is a great starting point to get them back on track. I think once summer is over, I would evaluate where your two oldest are and see if they place in Bigger. But I would pick back up Beyond now and I wouldn't add anything to nor would I substitute or change anything from it. I would just do Beyond as it is written. And to help you finish Beyond more quickly, I would probably place on hold DITHOR for now, if math is caught up then you wouldn't need to do that over summer, and I am not sure if your kids have mastered the word lists for spelling but you wouldn't need to do that over the summer. You would basically be doing history, rotating box, storytime, bible, music, and grammar. And from what you said about your kids and reading so much - it sounds like they like to read anyway so I would just have them read whenever. But I would try and set a timer to try and get in 2 hours of school per day 4 days a week. That is all. If you can have them focused for those 2 hours, then you can probably accomplish 1.5 units worth each week over the summer and that would get you finished in about 12 weeks. And with R&S, I would do as much of it orally as possible. This way your kids are only writing one small section down per day out of all that they are doing. We do as much orally as possible. It is a great fit for us and we are always done with grammar in 10-15 minutes per day. And there have been a few times I have had to double on my oldest's lesson so I only make her write one small section or portion for the day, not one from each lesson.

I hope some of this helps in some way. Homeschooling is quite a journey for both the kids and the parents. I know that I change every year and am always learning new things from other homeschooling moms. It is great having a wonderful support group.

I'm going to offer a different suggestion after asking a few questions.

Is your DD able, even if she doesn't want to, complete a days worth of Beyond easily? Can she do R&S2 even if she doesn't want to? How does she fit on the placement chart? I think if the answer to those first two questions is yes, and if she fits in Bigger on the placement chart you could easily bump her up to Bigger. I think I'd talk with her about how she's 9 now. Show her that your school is based on the Charlotte Mason method. Show her CM information about how 9 is when children are supposed to start taking control over their learning because they are old enough and responsible enough to do so. Brainstorm with her ways that you could help keep her motivated. Figure out a schedule with her that works for both of you. Set goals (I generally say something like "I want you to be on x unit by this holiday/trip/special day... if you work really hard you could be ahead and take a few days off!")

With your DS.... is he still not able to do the writing in Beyond? I think you could get LHFHG and start him fresh with that. Add in his level of math and let him work through the FMS books on his own pace (my girls do these last so they can do however many pages they want). Get whatever handwriting level you think he'd need or just have him copy the Bible verse each day. You could do the spelling lists/grammar from Beyond and add in the ERs.

This way you wouldn't have them in back to back guides. If you slowly let your older one take ownership of the guide (since she'll be 10) it might help you keep her on track. I know once my kids begin to take ownership of a guide that they enjoy it a lot more. Start out having her read the science readings. They are fairly easy readings to get used to doing. She could also look through all the boxes and get out anything that she needed for that day. Also, since your younger one will be older in LHFHG he could take some ownership over that guide. Have him go through the boxes and get what he needs... have him read the science too!

The previous posters had some great things to say! Sound like, to me, that you had a great first year. I'm sure it was exactly what you needed to all settle in and get used to this great life of homeschooling. I love it, I've been doing this for 20 years now.
I'll throw out a different option for you to consider. I have a couple of questions. Have you recently checked out the placement chart? Does your oldest place in Bigger?
Do you want to combine? If so, I would pick Beyond up at full speed doing exactly as written- as suggested earlier. Work on getting that down, then add in R&S 2 and maybe more copy work for the oldest. Do whatever math they are already doing. Then move into Bigger with oldest doing extensions-maybe even just reading the books if that is enough. I think you said she's a good reader? I can't remember.
If you would like to separate anyway, this is a good time to do it. Do 1/2 speed Beyond with the younger. Do 1/2 speed Bigger for a couple of weeks. You will probably be able to go full speed after that. Don't worry about DITHR for for quite awhile, maybe even waiting until Preparing if you'd like. Some people start in Bigger when the child is ready and some wait until Preparing. It will be a little more teacher intensive for a little while,doing Beyond and Bigger, but the guides gets more and more independent as you go along, especially if they are well placed. My daughter was on the older end of Bigger and by the last 1/3 did most of it independently and did the same in Preparing. There are many here that combine and many that separate. I prefer separating. .
Let us know if you have more questions. We will be interested to know what you have decided. Check out the placement chart. The good thing is, you picked the best curriculum right off the bat! . Some of us took too many years to get here.

MomtoJGJE and I were writing at the same time.

Wow!! Thank you all so much for the input. I really need to stay more connected on here when I am feeling anything!

So to answer some of the questions. Dd does place in Bigger. She can do the work in Beyond and R&S even though she doesn't WANT to. I like the idea of talking to her about being 9 and what that means for her learning. I also know that I need to toughen up with them because they both can do the work. They are both smart kids and I feel like they are just complaining then I give in and now they are being lazy.

When you say have them take ownership of the guide, do you mean they will be doing the majority of it in independently? I have read history, science, geography, etc up to this point. I do know they could read it though. I kind of like the idea of separating them only because my dd is quieter and more reserved than ds. When we are doing things together, his energy distracts her, so a part of me would like them doing their own thing. Any suggestions on that matter would be greatly appreciated.

When you say do 2 hrs of work 4 days a week, do you mean 2 hrs straight? Or just 2 hrs throughout the day? I have so much complaining now, I just am not sure where to start.

I hope that The Lord wants this journey for us. My heart tells me to stick with it and some days my flesh tells me otherwise. Thanks for all of the advice and support I 've found here.

By taking ownership I mean letting them read the guide and see what needs to happen. Then letting them build up to reading some of it on their own, and then building up to more and more. Especially once they are 9-10 and on the upper age range of the guide or in extensions. With Grace this year (Bigger) for the last 10 or so units she would choose each day between history or science to read. Some days she would want to do both and I'd let her, but most days she would pick whichever was the shortest

Ok, that sounds great! I think dd would like that! And ds for that matter. One more question, what is FMS?

I think the 2 hours a day being straight through or broken up is up to you. For me, we pretty much get up, eat breakfast, and start school. My oldest dd who is 9 works for 2 - 2.5 hours straight. But for my younger kids, they will work for about an 1 hour straight. As I type this up, I would probably split it up. My younger usually have really good attitudes about doing school but in general, we find that a schedule for the day sets the tone. So if we stick to our schedule, everyone is pretty happy.

hsftheart wrote:Ok, that sounds great! I think dd would like that! And ds for that matter. One more question, what is FMS?

Fine Motor Skills

Well, once you decide whether to stay together or split them up, I think it would really help if you would create a routine or a schedule you want to try to stick to each day. Yes, things happen and sometimes you do have to improvise or adapt your plans or expectations, but in general you should do the same thing(s) each day in the same order and it should not be optional. The knowledge of this, once they get used to it, will probably cut out 95% of the complaining and fighting. I also do have incentives or things they cannot do until their school work is done for the day. For my oldest it is reading for fun, because she loves that. My older 2 get 15 minutes of computer game time once school is done, and my 3rd born gets 10 minutes. This also motivates them. Think of some really cool fun thing you could try to use to motivate them to just get it done already! And for you, cut out other things of that time. Don't try to do laundry, dishes, prep dinner, answer email, or whatever you might do. I logged my phone out of Facebook because I was really bad at checking in while there was a dead moment, but then I would lose momentum and have a hard time getting back on track, or they would figure out what I was doing and it would derail everything.

I hope this makes sense, and I am not judging you just trying to suggest some things in case you hadn't already thought of them.

Blessings,

Thanks for clarifying FMS! I am really motivated by everyone on here, thanks so much! I don't take any responses as judgement, I truly appreciate the honesty! I am such a greenhorn at this and come from traditional schooling so this year has been " a year for me to de-school". I am learning so much.

I use screen time too as motivation, but I think I need to tighten the ropes until we get into a routine/schedule again. Once they are finished with school they can have 1 hour per day of screen time. I may cut it down to 15 mins for ds with the potential for an additional 15 mins if he can sit and work for an hour straight.

Please, please keep the ideas and input coming! I will let you all know what we decide to do.

Thank you, thank you all from the bottom of my heart!!

In regards to motivation.
This idea is not a positive incentive, but a natural consequence - my ds' know that if they don't get their work done in a timely manner they have to sit at the kitchen island in the evening while I prep the meal. There I oversee their work while the others are playing. They usually don't like that!
If they don't get along I make them do something together while I oversee.

Schedule wise I found a routine works best - but with a certain start, end and a mid break time.
I certainly need it!

Everyone is different. Hope you find what helps! The first year is toughest, I think you are doing great considering.

I do think I need to toughen up with ds. He is my biggest challenge right now. I almost think I should take away all screen time until we get our school routine down without any complaining. My biggest problem with this is that I know that when he was in public school, he did not act like he is acting now.

I need to have a firm routine with firm consequences. You ladies are very motivating!

I do have another question for anyone. Do most people go through their guides full speed, half speed, or what? And if you do a co-op one day then do you still to HOD that day too? I am really looking at my planning/routine and want to get going.

What are anyone's thoughts on this idea...finish Beyond with them together this summer. Then start both of them in Bigger in the fall, ds will turn 8 so start 1/2 speed with him and dd will turn 10 so do full speed plus extensions with her. We are planning to do a co-op in the fall on Mondays, so realistically I will have 3 full days with them. I work outside the home on Fridays but my dh works from home on Fridays so he could keep them on task too. We could plan to do some things on Saturdays if needed.

This brings another question to mind then. If I do 1/2 speed with ds and that is enough for him, when dd is finished with Bigger and he is not then I would still be working out of 2 guides if she started Preparing. Would this be too much since it is not reccommended to do back to back guides? Or would it be okay as long as dd takes ownership of the guide?

Thanks again for all the thoughts!