A Gal Chat about Scheduling

[my3sons]

Hello lovely ladies! It is that time of year when schedules are being made, put into practice, and tweaked, and I wanted to let you in on some gal chat Carrie and I had about it. It all started with this thought provoking post by Heart_Mom...
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=12201&p=88034#p88034

When I read this post, the first seed was planted that... maybe... just maybe... it would be possible to choose a slower, more relaxed scheduling pace - though you can see from my response, my initial thought was this would not be possible for me. Thanks to Heart_Mom, I really sat down and pondered this days on end - weeks, really. BTW - thank you, Heart_Mom!!! In fact, I had spent forever working out my schedule for MTMM, PHFHG, and LHFHG, making it look much like past years' schedules, which BTW worked extremely well up until now. I'll call past years' schedules my "shotgun approach". It involves getting up, getting going right away, blazing trails with no breaks for me, and finishing school by late lunch time. This approach worked for me very well for the past 10 years. The kids were younger, the guides were shorter, I was younger, my dh was around more, my parents were healthy, and I had to work in the afternoons. The shotgun approach was amazingly successful and very fulfilling for me for many years. Here is my shotgun approach for RevtoRev, end of BHFHG/start of PHFHG, and end of LHTH/start of half-speed LHFHG from last year...



However, this year, I am going into this school year tired, physically, emotionally, and mentally - and this is after a summer break - though summer really ended up not to be much of a break after all. Women often work through things by talking with other women about them. Hence the beauty of the HOD board, right?!? Well, Carrie and I have figured this out about each other, and it often helps just to let the other gal talk, talk, talk, and then share lots of ideas until one or two strike(s) a chord. Talking on the phone with Carrie, I realized these things...
- What worked in the past for a schedule may not work best right now
- I am 40 yo, with thyroid trouble, and I am feeling my age big time
- My dh is traveling more than he ever has in the past, and it is not going to get better
- My seventh grader is going to have to have a longer school day, I know this is necessary for his age, and I don't want him rushing through things
- My Dad is going through chemo as a preventative measure against pancreatic cancer, and I want to be there for my mom and him as much as possible
- I need some real time to fill my soul that isn't accompanied by 2000 interruptions
- I cannot see me constantly saying 'no' to all of my needs for the next 13 years it is going to take to homeschool my youngest child to the finish line
- I want real time to discuss Biblical things planned in the HOD guides, with each of my dc, but especially with my oldest so I can hang onto his heart

Sooooo, my new schedule is my version of a slower, gentler pace. I am excited to give it a whirl. It looks like this...



Here are some things that are different that I love about this slower, gentler schedule...
- Start time for me: It is later, which equals more sleep for me. I have time to cuddle with Emmett first because he loves this, we have cuddle up and read time in bed together by doing LHFHG Storytime which we both love, and I have private time to talk about Riley's Bible Quiet Time alone right after he did his part in his room.
- Start time for each of the boys: I let Wyatt choose his, with the rule it could not be earlier than 6 AM (he chose 6:15 AM). I let Riley choose his, with the rule it could not be earlier than 7 AM (he chose 7:15 AM). I planned for them to do school things they can do independently in their bedroom. This will not wake Emmett up too early, nor will it wake me.
- Chores and Breakfast: I actually have enough time planned for this not to be a RUSH. I also have enough time to get done what has to be done before we start our school day.
- Longer Teaching Block of time with Wyatt first thing (1 1/2 hours), including checkpoints for what he has done already independently
- Riley and Emmett love to play together first, and they also get worried they may not get their computer time in during the day (we don't have any other media time other than educational videos), so letting them play together first and then get in their computer time = them coming to school work with a great attitude ready to work while also giving me teaching time with Wyatt alone
- Checkpoints in place for Wyatt and Riley throughout day
- Emmett with me fairly early on in the day
- Knock out dictation, R & S English, and math for olders early on to be sure they are fresh and focused
- BIG break in the middle of the afternoon (as in from 1:30 to 3:30 PM) - this is great for boys to run off some steam outdoors, and for ME to have my Bible quiet time, prayer, and journal alone in the house when it's QUIET and I can actually think; also good time for me to exercise, do phone calls, assess what needs to be done for work, etc.
- After big break, kids come back to finish subjects they can do on their own, with just a bit of overseeing from me, and I can "float" between them as needed to help and prep for supper
- Kids' Quiet Time and then short outdoor play - I can work during this time and finish out supper as needed
- I also don't have to help them come up with a plan for a long afternoon all in a row of free time

I am excited about this slower, gentler schedule, and much more ready to start now! After much prayer and pondering, I feel at peace now to begin this year. I am sharing all this in case being a fly on the wall for this gal chat Carrie and I had may be helpful to any of you wonderful ladies as you consider what layout for your day fits you best now. Maybe the shotgun approach would be a welcome change, maybe the slower, gentler schedule would be a welcome change, or maybe somewhere in between - but hopefully this can spark some thoughts and chatting about how your day can be set up best to work for YOU this year, for some changes you made and found successful, etc. I am hoping others can share their thoughts and musings in this chat, so we can all help each other "think out loud" as we women like to do, and so we can all have the kind of year that's just right for each of us right now - for whatever our stage of life is!

In Christ,
Julie

ETA larger schedules that are easier to view per request.

[annaz]

First I wondered why I didn't see this thread. Then I figured out you just wrote it. Duh I also missed the thread on a more relaxed scheduling. Where was I with this? But we are having a year that will not go down in the books and it's just begun.

Anyway, I can't agree more. While you have a lot on your plate, I battle that I'm not allowed to feel this way when others have more children, parents with health issues, dh's who aren't home, or whatever their reasons are. I don't have any of these issues...except, this year we're battling hormones from dd and I, hers coming in and mine going out. And the hormone thing "going out" is not for sissies! Ah....the thyroid. That was a last year. Finally have that under control. Feel LOADS better. You know.....human! And what is it with everyone's thryroid on the fritz! I don't get that....but I'll move on. Having the hormone issues "going out" messes with anxiety levels. They're not really there....you're just loony. The entire summer, I worried about things that couldn't be substantiated. All the things we normally do for fun, just stressed me into oblivion. Hence.....simplicity, relaxation.

On the other hand.... you finally figure things out, get a good schedule going, think to continue it next year, and BAM! It doesn't work this year! No excitement , more of the same, with the feeling of a summer break that didn't appear to be. Now as being ... um.... 51...Holy Moses! Your mind can do it and your body can't. Anyway, I don't know what it was about this summer, but I've heard it from everybody!

I have plans, I want to do , I want things to work, to be scheduled, to be simple and to be relaxed. I want things to be neatly packaged with a bow, without anything that messes it up! God says, "Nay, nay". You can't afford your plans, you can't do it because your "parts" cramp, scheduling doesn't happen with puberty, and simplicity is only to be had for those who don't have anxiety issues from who knows where! I spend 50 thinking of the shoulda's and the what if's, which ailment will kill me, and how will I get through dd teens if she's like this now! There's no way I was like this, was I?

So probably all TMI, but I guess I have to learn to go with the flow. That's a huge thing coming from a very anal person! I need to lighten things when needed. Reschedule when needed. Don't be afraid to just go have fun. Life won't end if you skip something, or drop something. Kids won't die if Popcorn is for dinner or if today we skip math. Don't be afraid to just take a breather. More time for God and to trust in Him. Now I have to go make good on my words. And when I get that all figured out.....God will say, "Nay, nay"....here's something new!

[Robbi]

We have been pretty relaxed with start times but we r just finishing up the last few weeks of Beyond, so are doing fine but I am starting to "worry" about Bigger!!! Right now it takes us 2-2 1/2 hr to do Beyond & LHTH so we just head to the school room after breakfast, whenever we r ready.

Julie, thanks for this thread & I'm just curious what ur kiddos think of doing school in the afternoon? My DD doesn't what to do anything after lunch so we finish up & sometimes lunch is very late, like 1:30pm!!! (Of course only if brkft is later or we have a snack)

After the baby is born in Dec I think our schedule will need to change!! I'm just not sure its something i can schedule now. I will be coming back to this thread!! Thanks.

[mom23]

We have always done this more relaxed approach, until this past week! I'd always been the opposite, reading other people's threads on getting up and rolling right away, and thinking, "That could not work for us," only to finally come back late last week and realize that, maybe it could, after all . Our reasons for taking it slower were firstly dh's work schedule (from 3pm to 1am) and him needing quiet mornings to sleep a little bit, and me being up all hours of the night with a new baby, I found it was nice to sleep in in the mornings, as well! When everyone gets up, they like to take it easy with Daddy in the morning and we often didn't get started with school until 9:30 or 10. Then dh would be wondering what was for lunch by 11 and I'd have to stop school and figure out what that was going to be-I don't really feel like it can be just sandwiches or something simple when that's our main family time meal. So...when lunch was over and cleaned up, the kids were often involved with something fun with Daddy and we wouldn't get back to it until he left a little after 2. Plus, by then little brother was down for a nap and we could really get focused! This would put us finishing school by 4:30ish. Whew!

This past week I implemented an experiment-the kids hate it, I love it. We're keeping it . I get them up by 6:45 to make their beds and dress and meet in the living room. I get everyone started with school by 7 and we keep rolling thorugh until we're finished by 10:30. It's working-when they're doing school work they are quiet enough that Daddy and little brother can still sleep. Everyone has to fend for themselves for breakfast, during their first "recess" time, but it is so nice to really have time to make a nice meal for my husband with no stressing about school, or resenting him for interrupting something important... Plus I might actually get a chance to pay some attention to my house with the afternoons free!!

Ah! Seasons of life . I love how we serve a God whose mercies are new every morning and He will give us everything we need to meet each new season of our lives.

[MelInKansas]

Julie,

I appreciate you always sharing things that help the rest of us think through, or good ideas we can also use. I am still trying to figure out how to implement your little "stations" idea you used with your youngest so he could have different activities to rotate through while you were working with the older two.

I have found this "relaxed" thing to be how our lives have to roll with this baby, right now. Most often the baby is up around 6 AM. Sometimes he stays up, sometimes he goes back to sleep, but after a whole week of him getting up with a dirty diaper at 6, after which he would not go back to sleep, I decided God was trying to tell me to start my day earlier. And now that my body is used to it, it's really a good thing.

Anyway, I read my Bible, spend some time in prayer, of course move the baby around as needed but after his first morning feeding he's usually a very happy guy, and often I am also able to get a few tasks on my to-do list done, all while the 3 girls are still in bed. Then my 3rd DD usually joins us around 7, her sisters around 7:30, we make it to the breakfast table around 8....

Then once breakfast is done its usually time for baby to take a nap. So the girls get recess before we even start school! Actually some run-around time helps them to focus and helps school go really smoothly once we do get started - which is usually around 9:30. We all do Bible box together. I start my oldest on her independent work, then do reading with my 2nd, then history, storytime, rhyme in motion, rotating box with the 2nd. Math and fine motor, working my 3rd DD in there somehow with her LHTH or some other coloring books, workbooks, or something she can do at the table with us. Then 2nd and 3rd DD get a video while I do reading, history, spelling, rotating box....

We still finish by lunch, though sometimes it's a late lunch. We always have a snack. I wonder how this is all going to look once we start Bigger!

I just say, good for you for listening to your body's needs and making it a more relaxed day for you guys. Hopefully it will bear fruit in allowing your days to go more smoothly, your boys to have a great time with their school work and you to be able to rest when you need to. I totally get you on feeling the need to have that quiet time in the afternoon. I'm glad that works in. I am loving having a swingset outside, which we just got this spring, that the kids love to go out and play on. I'm dreading when the weather will not allow them to go out... though they've gone out in the rain and I'm sure they'd be willing to go out in cold and snow too.

[raindrops]

That sounds like a lovely schedule! I love the snuggle time scheduled first thing in the mornings.

And the bible reading time for you to relax in the afternoon.

Sounds like as good of a plan as it can get with 3 children!

I wish I could see your schedule... I only have internet on my phone and the text pictures are too blrry to read, even if I click on them to enlarge. Ah well.

[raindrops]

The responses in this thread are great.

Everyone's circumstances are different and they change all the time.

Some start at 6am, some at 10am... right now we have a lot of animals and 2 younge children so our day has a relaxed start as in go outside while the weather is nice and cool and feed all the animals, play with the chickens and alpacas, run around, whatever. When we get hungry or it gets too hot we come in and have breakfast and ds is begging to do school by then so we do. And it works great cause it is too hot outside anyways. After school he plays with sister and I read my bible until its time to fix lunch... then I can read some more while they eat.

Usually do laundry a few loads each day, do dishes while I cook dinner... you know... that is also my down time! I like to cook and put on a homeschool conference cd to listen to while I do the dishes. My homeschool group buys the cds for our library and I can borrow them for free. This has been a fantastic and refreshing resource.

Anyhow... all that works for now and when the kiddies get older and there is more school and also when its winter and too cold in the mornings our days will be much different!

Julie bump this thread up in like 5 years. LOL. . It can be like a time release thread.

[deltagal]

I love this thread simply because it underscores that the "opportunity" which homeschooling provides is to carve out a lifestyle that is unique and responds to your families needs. We are all different. And the many seasons we will venture through as wives and mothers and individuals will be quite varied. I have found in our home that the less schoolish our journey and the more our learning shapes itself around the many needs of our household the more enjoyable and effective. We work hard studying, reading, learning, but we also recognize that life for us is multi-dimensional. And so we strive to enjoy the journey! I spent some time reflecting a few months ago on the year ahead and what I hoped our accomplishments would be. I was reminded that very few of my aspirations for our family were exclusively academic, but more in the realm of spiritual growth, character, relationships and self-care:D When I lose sight of this the journey becomes a burden, so I'm thankful that threads like this help me "remember" who I believe God has called our family to be.

[Mercy]

I haven't posted in awhile, but I can't resist a scheduling thread!!

But, I can't see your photo page...

I am on my phone, so that could be it. Do you have to sign in to be able to view it?

Any suggestions of what I might be doing wrong?

Thanks for sharing btw...I love the sound of it.

Blessings,
Mercy

[my3sons]

Thanks for the responses so far, ladies! I am hoping this kind of "thinking out loud" can help each other out. It is my prayer that ladies can read these responses and feel like they can think through the specifics of their situation now to make a schedule that fits their life well. I think the responses here so far are wonderful and will accomplish that goal well! I am going to edit my original post to have the schedules be shown larger rather than as small clickables. This should help those viewing them on their phones.

In Christ,
Julie

[OneFunSon]

Julie,
Your post is so timely. Even though I was super excited about everything we’ll be studying in M2MM this year I just was not excited to start…. SCHOOL. (The delayed shipping of M2MM was a blessing for me!)

I have never been able to stick to a timed schedule so we have alternated between relaxed and pseudo-shot-gun in the past, sometimes in the same month! I had just been reading the scheduling posts and was thinking, “This year we really need to get up, get going, work, work, work, and try to get done soon after lunch because there is a lot to do.” Your post reminded me of why we homeschool and what is really important to me and why I don’t feel peace when I’m pushing and stressed about “getting the next thing done”. I never really can keep up that kind of pace for long, but I feel guilty when we’re not. Then I feel even guiltier if I am on that pace but we’re not really enjoying homeschooling – and that’s because we’re neglecting the important things that make homeschooling fun and worthwhile.

-I need some real time to fill my soul that isn't accompanied by 2000 interruptions
- I want real time to discuss Biblical things planned in the HOD guides, with each of my dc, but especially with my oldest so I can hang onto his heart.

These things, especially the last one, have been on my heart also. And I want to enjoy M2MM. It looks sooo great, I don’t want to rush through it and just “get it done”, or feel like that’s what I’m doing.

I’m not sure yet exactly how I need to change our schedule. I like your comment about doing a combination. As was mentioned in the other thread, I think the biggest thing may be to just be more relaxed in my attitude, give myself permission to take time for the important things, and take intentional breaks (I like the idea of the big afternoon break) instead of letting him take lots of little unplanned breaks spurred by distractions.

While you have a lot on your plate, I battle that I'm not allowed to feel this way when others have more children, parents with health issues, dh's who aren't home, or whatever their reasons are. I don't have any of these issues...except, this year we're battling hormones... And the hormone thing "going out" is not for sissies!
On the other hand.... you finally figure things out, get a good schedule going, think to continue it next year, and BAM! It doesn't work this year! No excitement , more of the same, with the feeling of a summer break that didn't appear to be. Now as being ... um.... 51...Holy Moses! Your mind can do it and your body can't.

Ohhh yes. Annaz, your post brought a smile and some reassurance that I’m not the only one with the hormone thing going on! (Soon to be 53 and a 13 yo boy.) Besides being more anxiety prone, I also find I have become much more distraction oriented than I ever was before and I don’t have the stamina that I had even 5 years ago. I just can not concentrate on things that take brainpower after a certain point in the day.

I appreciate you always sharing things that help the rest of us think through, or good ideas we can also use.

The responses in this thread are great.

I was reminded that very few of my aspirations for our family were exclusively academic, but more in the realm of spiritual growth, character, relationships and self-care:D When I lose sight of this the journey becomes a burden, so I'm thankful that threads like this help me "remember" who I believe God has called our family to.

I agree! It is so reassuring to see all the different schedules Moms use that work, especially when someone has the courage to make a complete change from what they’ve been using and it works great for life’s current circumstances.
You Moms with babies and those who are doing more than one guide – you’re amazing!

Thanks for sharing ideas and inspiration ladies!
Peace&Joy,
Karen

[raindrops]

I can see the schedules now. Julie, thank you for resizing. That was very kind of you.

[annaz]

Julie,

Ohhh yes. Annaz, your post brought a smile and some reassurance that I’m not the only one with the hormone thing going on! (Soon to be 53 and a 13 yo boy.) Besides being more anxiety prone, I also find I have become much more distraction oriented than I ever was before and I don’t have the stamina that I had even 5 years ago. I just can not concentrate on things that take brainpower after a certain point in the day.

[Peace&Joy,
Karen

FYI, someone told me about Puritan Pride's Salmon Oil (brain), and Macca Root (hormones). I'm desperate not to use anything that is an RX! So far, so good on both these!

[Mercy]

Julie,
Thank you! Much better. And I really love the cuddle time / bible time. Thanks so much for sharing!! Reminds me what a blessing schedules are and that it is time for me to do one.
In Jesus,
Mercy

[John'smom]

Totally agree. I was causing myself so much stress before school with trying to figure out how to be done my lunch time. I finally resigned myself it wasn't going to happen with other things we do here in morning (Bible together, 30 min of chores, etc.). It wasn't a happy resignation though. I kept thinking why can everybody else do it. Again wrong thoughts (not to compare ourselves among ourselves). I'm sure you sharing where you are at in life will be a HUGE help to others. I know it would of me at the end of July beginning of August.

Just read this today and it was a blessing: "Better an imperfect schedule lived with an attitude of love and cheerfulness, than rigorous efficiency with a cost of aggravation and anger."