A little frustrated today...help!

[tnahid]

I want to say that I LOVE the HOD approach to education. I want to make that clear, but today I am just frustrated. I feel like my sons are so black and white, so literal that it is difficult to draw out these deeper questions, especially in DITHOR. I feel like they look at me with a deer in the headlights type And I just seem to never get done with everything each day. The lure of just doing workbooks is looking really good today! Ugh. Will this way of learning eventually sink in more for them? I know they are young and were in school 2 years before last year. And my oldest just seems academically and emotionally slow in my opinion. I have also had a very hormonal day with lots of tears in my room, etc. I hate that! I have been praying continually all day though. Appreciate your prayers.

P.S. My parents just left yesterday after being here for 4 days or so. My mother had a confrontation with me about how "free" my children were in their lessons and that they need to learn to get up earlier, etc, are they behind, etc? A whole attack on everything we do and believe in. (I come from a very long line of public school teachers on both sides of my family)

I am just rambling, but so glad I have this place to come, so full of godly women, sisters in Christ. Some days are just really hard, but I know I am blessed.

Seriously, does the CM method eventually "TAKE" even for the most black and white type of child? Thanks!

[MelInKansas]

I can't answer your question about whether or not they will eventually get it, if it will get easier for them. I imagine the answer has to be "yes," because its just like anything, if you exercise your muscles you will get stronger and it will get easier. I am sure with some perseverance you will see the Lord do great work, even in this year.

It sounds like its all the stress combined with your mom's criticism, the stress of having house guests, and getting back into a regular routine after some interruptions. I'm sorry it's so hard though, persevere and the Lord will bring good fruit in His time!

I have been feeling a bit lost myself as it seems our routine keeps getting interrupted by illness, mostly mine. I keep thinking if my DD was going to school then me being sick wouldn't mess everything up. Sigh. But we have still managed to get school mostly done even when I'm not feeling 100% (don't ask what my house looks like right now, it's pretty scary).

[Mercy]

(((hugs))) to you Tina. I always seem to have you in my prayers, as I go about my day you pop in my head, so I lift u up. Your oldest and my oldest seem similar sometimes, although mine devours books. I have a lot of difficulty helping him learn to be faithful in his tasks and writing is like pulling teeth. All this to say...keep fighting the good fight. This year has been one of the hardest because even he has really begun to listen to those ” helpful” critics around us who say maybe homeschooling isnt the best option out there. I have had to go back to my roots of why we are doing this, relist those scriptures so I can ponder the purpose of being my sweet childrens very own tutor and influence their hearts for our Fathers kingdom.

Hang tight! You are doing just fine.
Praying for you my cyber friend,
Mercy

[kzacarkim]

Hi Tina,
Hope more seasoned moms chip in . I feel your pain though, in regards of choosing to homeschool. I have people all the time, including my family, asking me when I will put my kids in school . It's very easy to second guess yourself, specially when people of your circle of influence, like your mom, does not really believe in it. I have some hard days too. But I feel like I'm imparting the fear of the Lord in my kids hearts and that's more important than any academics. They have their whole lives to learn academics, but a very short time at home, when you think about a whole lifespan. I want to cherish every possible moment. As far as literal kids, every child is different. You can't push them to be something they are not. But I'm thinking it will get better . My 5 yo didn't really get the Burgess books at first...but I persevered and I have seen a great improvement in his comprehension and attention span. I almost got discouraged because I didn't like the burgess books myself at first. But hearing such great reviews, I thought It would be worth a try.
Hang in there We're here for each other!

[holdinon]

Tina,
I don't have any advice or many words of comfort, but I do know that YOU know what is best for your kiddos. It may take all we have (and then some) to give it to them, but we know our kids. And we know where God is leading. So just hang onto Him and trust Him.

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him.” II Peter 1:3 (NIV) (emphasis mine). If we can just lead our children to know HIM above all else, EVERYTHING the need for LIFE will be added.

I am praying for you!
Angie

[water2wine]

Tina I want to encourage you that my son is a very black and white thinker. He was definitely a workbookaholic kind of guy before HOD. I was worried he would not be able to do CM and worse not really ever be able to enjoy it. He absolutely loves HOD and he has become I think more open in his thinking because of it. In fact he is like a little researcher on things that are sort of related to what we did in HOD but just sparked his interest to know more. I now often find him reading more on things covered in HOD. He is essentially now hungry for learning instead of task oriented because of HOD. So definitely give it time for the love to happen for your child. You won't want to miss it. In the mean time make sure you are following the guide as written and the instructions on things like narration that are in the guide as well. That makes a huge difference in them finding the love for and the blessing from HOD. Truly when they get it I have found they never grow tired of HOD and that is a huge blessing because I never do either.

On the family issue. My heart goes out to you. I have a family that is not excited I hs and worried about my poor "deprived" children's future. It can be very hard to not have that support or even acceptance. But I know that my call is from God and it has finally occurred to me God may have first of all not sent them the email and perhaps also does not want me to imitate their life for my kids. God is our only judge on this. I know that He is pleased we use HOD because I know that He called us to it and that it honors Him. People may not applaud but I honestly feel God approves and that is a better feeling than all the family support in the world. So I rest in that. Praying God will give you peace to rest in that as well. Family disapproval on hsing methods can be very hard. Sorry you are experiencing that at the same time you are struggling. I feel like that can't be from God but only you can know for sure. Praying for you.

[pjdobro]

I have one of those literal black and white guys. No shades of gray for him and sometimes that makes life difficult. We've been with HOD going on our 4th year now, and I'm really starting to see the benefits of that. My literal guy is really starting to get the deeper meaning of things and surprising me with his in depth analysis. So hang in there, I do think it comes with time. More importantly though I see my the depth of understanding that my dc have in God's Word and the empathy that they are developing for others. Today we were trying to pick out our project for DITHOR. I thought for sure they would pick the book project which I thought sounded like fun, but they picked out the encouragement cards to do for someone who needed encouragement now. That blessed my heart that they were thinking of how they could bless others instead of thinking about just having fun. That is something that they wouldn't get elsewhere. Being able to lead our dc's hearts towards God and caring more for others is far important than anything else. It's difficult when you meet with criticism especially from those your love and respect, but remember why you are doing this. Keep fighting the good fight and doing what's right.

[tnahid]

Thank you all SO SO much. You don't know what it means to have your comforting words, encouragement and prayers. Today has been one of the lowest, most beaten up, crazy days in a long while, yet God's provision and love has still shown through it all. I am not normally this emotional, even on my worst hormonal days. I have cried off and on ALL day long, some tears of joy while listening to certain Christian songs in the truck, some when my children are bickering, etc. Even my youngest son said at dinner, "Mom, are you crying again." He prayed for me and actually thanked God for my "tears of blessing" he called them. Wow. I guess they were in a way. Tears and sorrow can be very cleansing sometime.

Actually, I want to share something amazing that happened today. When we got home from the park (from our fossil dig/nature walk) this afternoon, my son was looking for his "Almost Home" history book and of course, couldn't find it. He was wandering around like a drunken sailor looking in the least likely places for it to be, like a basket on my kitchen counter. I was near explosion point! I just ran to my room, got in my closet and began BAWLING my eyes out, asking God to empty me of this anger and deliver me from selfishness etc...After I was composed, I came back to the room where my son opened his arms and hugged me telling me he was sorry, etc. I told him it was not him, that I wasn't being patient and how much I loved him. Very precious moment.

Anyway, right after that, I noticed that our sweet, beloved pet dog, Emma, was missing. It dawned on me that we LEFT her at the PARK!!!! My heart dropped to my feet. How could I have done this! An hour had passed since we got home. I threw the children in the truck, while I was praying and bawling, my oldest son was praying and bawling, and the other two were quiet and encouraging in the back. As I pulled into the parking lot, I saw Emma wrapped around a tree with a blue cord. She was looking at me and I bawled some more! I walked up and a man told me that they had called Animal Control because when they called the number on the collar, it was disconnected. Of course, I have not yet gotten her a new collar since we MOVED from KY to TX a few months ago. Anyway, the Animal Control guy had JUST gone up to get something he forgot and was headed back to take her to the pound. As we were leaving the park, he pulled in and I told him she was my dog. OOOOOOOh, my goodness. Just 5 minutes later, she would have been in the POUND!

I praised God and thanked him through TEARS all the way home. He showed me exactly in time to get her. He answered our prayers for her to be right there. I tell you this has been a day! Right now, my husband is on his way back from GA and his plane just got re-routed to San Antonio because of major thunderstorms in Dallas right now. He won't be here until probably 2:00 a.m. and he has been gone since Thursday night. Plus he has to leave again at about 5:00 a.m. to go to San Angelo which is about a 4-5 hour drive and won't be home until very late tomorrow night. Ugh!!! The devil is busy, but I know in whom I have believed, and I know that He is faithful. I don't know where I would be or what I would do without the hope of Christ Jesus. I don't know how anyone can live one moment without God! He is my only hope and strength. He is ALL I NEED!

I love you all very much and I bless you for praying for me today. The Lord was answering them through it all. I am still here and God is working all things for the good of those who love Him.

P.S. Thank you for the encouragement to keep going with HOD and my black and white son. He is VERY task oriented as well, but he definitely loves his books and his narration has improved since last year. I will continue to follow the Spirit's lead in all of this. I know he brought me to HOD again this year, no doubt.

[MelInKansas]

Oh my, that would definitely have to be right up there in one of your hardest days, and I have been there too!

I find myself in those times where I am always crying because there is something deep in my soul that needs ministered to by the Lord. It happened here just recently where I was in despair, but the Lord was faithful to lift me out and show me my hope in that situation. I will pray for you, and pray for encouragement. Praise the Lord for your sweet children and how sensitive and loving they are. I'm so glad for you that you were able to get back in time to rescue your dog, don't be too hard on yourself for forgetting, just praise the Lord you remembered in time!

Blessings to you!

[Heidi in AK]

Tina, that sounds like it definitely does rank at the top of the "hardest days" list! And after the criticism you received during your mom's visit, I'm sure it just left your heart racing! Add to that the things you have been dealing with regarding schooling, and I'm sure you were just held in your Father's hands.

Even before reading this post today, I can concur with Mercy, that you are on MY heart often too, as I think about other moms around the world doing HOD. God is holding you tenderly in His capable hands, and I don't know what lesson He has for you in all of this, except perhaps that HE and He alone is worthy of not just your praise, but your trust.

It helps me know how to pray for you. HUGS, my friend!!!!

[countrymom]

If it is any consolation, a friend and I took our boys to the beach/park this summer and she left her dog there too. None of us realized it at the time. I will be praying for you. I think just getting back into a routine and schedule will help. Having company in your home can be very difficult for all. God bless!

[tnahid]

What beautiful women you all are for taking time out of your busy day to encourage me like this just when I need it most. It is a new day and God's grace is new every morning. I am so thankful, and I am in continual process of sanctification, emptying myself of me, so that I can be filled with Jesus. I have a long way to go, but I know my Father is faithful and he IS at work molding and shaping us all into the image of His divine Son. I am reminded of the words of a Rita Springer song called "I Have to Believe" It is on youtube.com. Take a listen! I think you will all be lifted up as well.

The sun is shining bright today after the storm last night! The SON is shining bright in my heart after the storms raging within last night. And yes, trusting Jesus more and more is what I want!

Here's the link for this song. I am singing it LOUD with joy this morning in my study room! Kids are working independently and I am sure listening! LOL I love it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5qlEUayQAY

[Heather4Him]

Tina, I just wanted to let you know that I'm lifting you up in prayer, too, and am SO encouraged by all the love and faith shown here by each of you Godly women. What a blessing for all of us to be a part of this wonderful board!!