Eep! Comparison bug strikes!

[alydar]

We have friends visiting who have similar aged kids as ours. In fact, their ds is only 4 months younger than our ds. He's in public k. So he was showing his homework and school folder to me and I started getting this sinking feeling in my stomach. There were math worksheets with addition and subtraction, sight word worksheets, writing work, etc........and I was thinking, "Are we doing enough??"

Our ds is halfway through LHFHG and will be turning 7 at the end of May. He's doing all the 1st grade level work in there except for the math. For that he's doing the manual as written with the K workbooks(I wanted to make sure he had a solid start in math). We're still working on some phonics and also he can do some of the level one readers. I had planned on him doing the same approach with Beyond next - using the manual as written so he would be doing the 1st grade math but I guess officially he'd be somewhere between 1st and 2nd for the other work.

Gah! Please forgive me! I hate it when this happens (which isn't often thank goodness!). I feel really SUPER good about the spiritual foundation they are getting with HOD and that is my #1 top priority for them. I guess I just need to hear that they are fine in the academic areas, too; that an HOD education is giving them all the necessities and more when held up against a ps education.

Thank you for listening and putting up with this.

[raceNzanesmom]

((hugs)) Don't let the enemy get you down. Look at the big picture. Your son is getting a solid Biblical education and will learn all the same math, sight words, etc as your friend's child. The end result will be a great education and, most importantly, a love for and knowledge of the Lord.

[water2wine]

I will just say that the only one who would want you to compare in that way and come up short is the enemy. Often ps teacher send home ditto sheets of stuff they have not even taught. Having pulled 4 kids out of ps I can absolutely promise you that the work you see come home is no reflection of the knowledge a child has in their head or what has been taught well in school. Each one of my children had been "taught" and tested even but when it came down to taking them out of ps and seeing what they knew they were, all even my smartest and most capable child, no less than a year behind.

If you read what you say

I feel really SUPER good about the spiritual foundation they are getting with HOD and that is my #1 top priority for them. I guess I just need to hear that they are fine in the academic areas, too; that an HOD education is giving them all the necessities and more when held up against a ps education.

Ask yourself this question. When you stand before God and are asked how you educated your child will He compare your results with those of ps? That is the question I always ask myself when I have just been subjected to the sometimes brag, sometimes innocent, "look how great my kid is doing!" thing that gets your mind comparing. Who am I answering to and what is the standard really that matters.

We all do that or at least have done it. We have all been there. I promise you if the enemy has attacked one of us there he has done it to us all. He is not very creative.

You are a great mom. You are giving your child a great education. And you are the perfect person called to the perfect resources God has provided for exactly the perfect things He wants your child to know. I promise He will not compare you to the kids in ps when you have to give an account to Him on raising the children He entrusted in your care.

[lmercon]

As we've all heard, comparison is death! However, we all do it from time to time. Educating your children the CM way does take some faith because it is a process. Trust the process because it works. I taught fourth grade in the ps system, and I would choose HOD to educate my dc over ps any day of the week! It is superior in EVERY way. You will be amazed at how your dc's skills and abilities grow over the years. Also, what is so important and impossible to assess now is the love of learning that will blossom. Unfortunately, the institutional way of educating children has a killing-effect on the love of learning. HOD only causes that to increase. Your dc will want to learn - even learning things on their own. And as you said, there is nothing better than bringing the gospel to our dc each and every day in a meaningful way. God's providence is weaved throughout all of the study of history. All glory is given to Him as you teach the wonders of science. Even diagramming sentences is "Bible-covered." The academics will come. Trust the process and enjoy each day.
Laura

[alydar]

Thank you all! This board is such a blessing!

raceN - I know the path we are walking now is the right path; the one set by God. To love the Lord with all their hearts is what we want most! Thank you for your kind words!

W2W - yes!! There will be much to account for when face to face with the Lord and I do want to be able to say that I made Him first above all in their lives. Thank you for your perspective of having had kids in ps before. That helps so much! And thank you for the much needed words of encouragement! I guess I'm like any other mom - I just want the very best for my family. And I do feel so lead to HOD and that this is their intended path right now. I hate when that doubt, the enemy, creeps in. I just need to lean on the Lord more at those times and find my comfort and confidence in Him.

Imercon - your perspective as a ps teacher is so helpful and encouraging! I do need to trust the process. We are so young in the whole education thing I sometimes have a hard time seeing the big picture. I want my kids to have a standard by which to measure the world around them and I want that measuring stick to be the Lord and His Word. Thank you!

I'm feeling better after talking with my mom and with DH about my concerns and after reading such wonderful and caring repsonses here. Thank you all again!

Much love and blessings!
Whitney

[water2wine]

Also just want to say that in the elementary years ps might move a bit differently than we do. But my dd that is now past that phase and has friends in ps who are in honors and AP courses she is finding she holds her own with quite well when they discuss school. All of her friends have told her they are jealous of the education she is getting being able to hs. So it changes as they get older what on track is anyway. They all hate the social pressures they are facing and education wise they do not seem to be ahead of her. In fact sometimes she can explain things to them. You'll see it will even out. I am on the other side now seeing that it really does work out in the final stretch. Remember they are not bound to teach toward understanding. Their standard is the all mighty standardized test.

[holyhart]

Another thing to remember is that public schools teach children WHAT to think, HOD teaches children HOW to think. That is priceless. We are not teaching our children to just so that they can put answers on any worksheet and then forget it later, we are teaching them to have mastery and true knowledge of what they are learning. I understand how it can look intimidating, but don't let the enemy get you down and make you doubt your calling!

If this is encouraging at all, my younger sister is now in college. She is a very bright young lady who graduated ps with a 4.0. And yet it FLOORS me all the time how much she does NOT know! In history, my dd7 usually knows more than my sister. Mind you I'm sure my sister was "taught" all this stuff at some point, but was mostly taught to be able to know it for the upcoming test and not to really KNOW the information. Even she is now aware of how short her education was.

You are doing enough! More than enough!

[blessedmomof4]

Sad to say, I have gotten discouraged by fellow-homeschoolers in this area When I was teaching my oldest two for grades 3 and K, I had just discovere a literature-based curriculum after having used a more "schoolish" one, and had what I thought was a great year. I belonged to a hs group and lived in a state that required an annual review. The reviewer was also a homeschool mom, a very experienced one who used a "schoolish" curriculum. When I showed her what I thought was a wonderful portfolio of notebooking pages and projects my kids had done, her comment was, "Is that all?" It made me feel so small and insecure, and the next year I went back to another heavy textbook curriculum and had an awful time-wound up dropping it mid-year and piecing something together on my own.
Just sharing to say that it's easy to have doubts when others are doing something else, but I should have listened to my heart that told me living books was the fit for my family. I'm so glad I am back to that now with my younger children, and I'll never let someone else's opinion shake me again. God gave ME these children to teach and raise, and HE leads me to what is good for MY family

[annaz]

Sad to say, I have gotten discouraged by fellow-homeschoolers in this area When I was teaching my oldest two for grades 3 and K, I had just discovere a literature-based curriculum after having used a more "schoolish" one, and had what I thought was a great year. I belonged to a hs group and lived in a state that required an annual review. The reviewer was also a homeschool mom, a very experienced one who used a "schoolish" curriculum. When I showed her what I thought was a wonderful portfolio of notebooking pages and projects my kids had done, her comment was, "Is that all?" It made me feel so small and insecure, and the next year I went back to another heavy textbook curriculum and had an awful time-wound up dropping it mid-year and piecing something together on my own.
Just sharing to say that it's easy to have doubts when others are doing something else, but I should have listened to my heart that told me living books was the fit for my family. I'm so glad I am back to that now with my younger children, and I'll never let someone else's opinion shake me again. God gave ME these children to teach and raise, and HE leads me to what is good for MY family

(((( Hugs )))))

[tjswaine]

Hi alydar,

I just wanted to reassure you in regards to the Singapore Math. My oldest did LHFHG last year with the Earlybird Math, as I wanted to give him a strong foundation. We followed the Math schedule in the guide and did all the hands-on activities (it was a very simple year for him, but oh so worth it). This year we have continued on with 1a & 1b as scheduled in the Beyond guide. By the end of 1b he understood regrouping concepts, simple multiplication and division, etc. He has just begun 2a and is handling it wonderfully. Enjoy Singapore and have fun with it with your ds. It will definitely get more complicated for them in future years and these early years are so important for building that strong foundation in understanding Math.

Enjoy!