Scope of Beautiful Girlhood?

[pjdobro]

I'm wondering if you wonderful ladies can give me some advise. I've noticed that Beautiful Girlhood is included in RTR and we won't get to that guide for several more years yet. My daughter will be past 11 by the time we get to that guide. I looked at the TOC of Beautiful Girlhood and couldn't quite figure out if it is what I am looking for now. I see some early signs of puberty approaching with my dd, who is almost 9. I don't think the full forces or puberty will be on us immediately (though it was for my sister at 9 ), but I'm thinking it will be here before we get to RTR. I need to figure out something to help explain to her what is happening to her body even at this stage. Most everything that I look at has a very ungodly approach. I want to be frank but gentle and I want her to understand the changes that are happening to her body. Is this something that would be in the scope of Beautiful Girlhood? Should I get it now or is there something else that would be beneficial now? Thanks for you help!

[momtofive]

Patty,

Here's what we've planned to do with our son. Since our son is 10 and will be going into CTC this fall, he won't reach RTR until he's 11 almost 12! I talked to my husband about this, and we've decided to get the RTR guide and the purity books included in that study and just do that part of it with him now, or at least this summer. My husband will be the one going through the study with him, of course , but I'll still read the books ahead of time in case he has any questions. (Then, at least, I'll know what he's reading and learning before he learns it.)

If you feel that your daughter is ready for this sooner, maybe think about doing this study with her now. As her mother, you'll be the best one to know when she's ready for it. Our plan with our son will be to go through the study with him, then when he's in RTR, we'll likely use another of Bob Schulz's books on godly manhood, or at least something along those lines, during the devotion time he would have been doing the purity study. I just thought I'd put that out there as an option, as we've just discussed this ourselves and have come to a decision. . . . like, yesterday! Again, you'll know best what to do with your sweet daughter!

In Christ,

Lisa

[momtofive]

Hi again Patty!

I also wanted to mention that I've extensively looked into the resources used in the purity study included in RTR, and have found them to be very biblicly done. They address the topics in a very biblical, godly way. You won't find any graphic pictures taking a child's mind to places we'd not like them to go. I know for sure that one of the books was written by parents that were looking for a godly study on this subject, and couldn't find any that were biblicly based, so they wrote their own. The samples I've seen are very well done. So, no worries there! Yay, thank you Carrie for again picking such well written materials!

I also wanted to add that there are many other biblicly based books on becoming a godly woman. One that immediately pops into mind is "A Young Woman After God's Own Heart", by Elizabeth George. There is also "A Little Girl After God's Own Heart", and "God's Wisdom for Little Girls" by the same author. I actually haven't read these titles yet, but have read "A Woman After God's Own Heart" and it was very well done. I'm sure once you get to looking, you may find many others that look good, on this topic. Just wanted to add that there are many titles that you could replace the purity study with, when that time comes for doing RTR. You may even be able to adapt the study and do the suggested activities that Carrie has written within the guide with the other books, such as writing noteworthy quotes in their Common Place Book. Anyway, just some random additional thoughts!

In Christ,

Lisa

[Carrie]

Patty,

Lisa did a terrific job of helping you already, so I'll just chime in with a similar thread that may help too as you ponder. Link: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=8019

Another thought I had was that you could perhaps do only the little booklet From Girl to Woman, which is very short and focuses on puberty without going into consummation in marriage, and wait on the rest of the study until your daughter gets older. You'll know best though if she is ready for something more in depth on becoming a young woman of God. If she is, then the fuller study as done in RTR would be best.

Blessings,
Carrie

[pjdobro]

Thank you Carrie and Lisa for your responses. I'm feeling more like just the area of puberty needs to be addressed now, but I'm sure the rest will need to be covered sooner rather than later as well. I am still torn how to handle this. Are the booklet and the other book (God's Design..) scheduled to be used in RTR or are they there more for reference? I'm trying to figure out if I just talked to her more informally now about puberty, would this mess up the study later especially if I used the booklet? I'm wondering if it would be prudent to try to use the purity study this year along with Preparing? I don't want it to be something that is too much for, but I don't want to put it off long either. What really precipitated me thinking about this was I finally bought her training bras this week because she needed them. She's been showing signs of moodiness and tiredness as well that make me think the hormones are starting to kick-in. I guess from that perspective she could really use some guidance in how to handle the moods that the hormones bring. Is that something that the Beautiful Girlhood study would cover? Thank you for your help!

[BrooklynsMom03]

Patty.....
Hi....Great question! I have been wondering how to handle some of this with my daughter....looking forward to the feedback from this post. My daughter who wont be 8 until the end of Feb....has really started some body changes....she has gained some weight around middle....where she has always been really small....I bought her a sports bra to wear under her tee shirts...because she is starting to develop....a bit....I have been a bit complexed on how to handle this myself! I did raise two kids already...but they were boys! I didnt know we would be here...so soon!!! Beth in Idaho

[Carrie]

Patty,

The little booklet From Girl to Woman is a very short, very to-the-point booklet that is very inexpensive and could easily be read in one sitting. It does not go into consummation in marriage, making it a great first step into understanding puberty in a God-honoring way. I would encourage you to just go ahead and get that one little booklet and go over that with your little honey now. The rest of the Beautiful Girlhood study is not as much about the changing body as it is about how to live for the Lord as girls grow into young womanhood.

If you do go the route of going over the little booklet now, I would encourage you not to talk too deeply beyond what is in the booklet, but simply be open to allow your daughter to ask questions. Often, young girls don't need all the answers at such a young age, and if you're anything like me I tend to overtalk something! Young girls often just need an understanding that God has planned for their body to change in this way. Another thought would be to just get the Girl Option Package to peruse the books yourself. Then, if you felt your daughter needed what they contained now, you could decide whether to add the RTR guide for that or not then.

Here's a link to the booklet description:
http://www.heartofdakota.com/rtr_hearts ... girl-woman
It can be purchased for $3.95 off this link: http://www.heartofdakota.com/rtr_hearts ... ckages.php
(You'll have to scroll down a ways to find it.)

Hope that helps! Honestly, the booklet is the easiest way to introduce puberty that I've found! My older sister, who has 7 children, agrees From Girl to Woman and From Boy to Man are the best things she has ever used for that stage too! I recommended both to her when her oldest children first hit puberty, and she was so relieved to get the booklets in hand and be able to immediately address puberty in such a Biblical way.

Blessings,
Carrie

[pjdobro]

Thank you so much for your input on this Carrie. This dilemma has weighed heavy on my heart lately. I do tend to be a "talk it to death" sort of person so something that is nice and to the point sounds like what I need. I feel more comfortable taking this in small steps so I think a puberty talk is where we'll start. I hope I can catch you at a conference to look over the whole purity study in detail. I'm going to try to make it to Greenville in March, but it is a ways from here and I'm not for sure if I'll be able to make it. I do think the whole study is something that we'll decide to do before we get to RTR so I'll be in prayer as to the timing.

Lisa, I meant to mention before that I have read the Woman After God's Heart myself several years ago and was both convicted and blessed by it. I will have to look into the study for girls. Thanks for mentioning that.