Potty training and homeschooling at the same time?

[kvmck]

Okay, it just occured to me to ask your advice... I hope its okay to ask this kind of question
My youngest dd just recently turned 3. My oldest are 9 and 7. For my oldest two I put the potty down, told them about it, had them sit on it and showed them how to pull up their little underwear and that was it. My oldest 2 just did it (they were almost 3), within a few days they were "trained" and I didn't have to do anything else (well, they'd call me over to help but I didn't have to do anything to get them to actually go). They thought it was just great. Well, along comes my youngest and she doesn't want to have anything to do with it, she is perfectly content to have pee running down her legs (sorry ) I am wondering how some of you have dealt with this ? I've read a couple potty training books and it seems so time intensive so that I don't know if I should take a homeschool break for a few days to concentrate on the training--I think I'm going to have to deal with some obedience issues as she won't even sit on the potty! My older 2 don't have a lot of independent learning activities to do, so school is a bit dependent upon my involvement. Or should I just tell the olders that we're potty training Susannah and we'll work our school in around that (the problem being that once I go to help/deal with the youngest than the oldest two will go find other activities to do).?

[Kathleen]

Kristen,

That can definitely be a challenge!! I posted about our potty training experience with my youngest last year on this week-in-review. (You'll have to scroll down to my post.)

viewtopic.php?f=14&t=2120

I found that drinking a lot helped speed the process because there were lots of opportunities for doing the right thing (even though there were a few accidents, too). We usually only have water or milk, so lots of juice was a big treat! And, rewarding everyone and having a celebration (our "potty-party") really brought on the positive peer pressure from the brother and sister. My 4 yo (at that time) was taking her brother to the bathroom and cheering him on because she wanted another treat. We only used the treats for a week or 2, but they brought big dividends.

If you give it a try for a few days and it does not go well, I'd quit and wait a month or 2. You don't want to make yourself crazy! If you take a summer break, that may be a good chance to jump into it with both feet.

Good luck!
Kathleen

[8arrows]

This is not a question I am qualified to answer even though I have 8 children (smile). My three year old is still not trained and does not care! She is not getting any treats or pop until we have progress! I understand your pain. The only reason she ever went was for the Skittles. Oh, well, she learned her colors (at least the Skittles colors). Does that count for school? Maybe it is just the younger ones. None of my others were this old. No answers, just sympathy. It is hard to accomplish while teaching school.

[Mom2Monkeys]

I finally gave up with my 3yo...we tried M&Ms and all sorts of things. He even went to grandma's for a long visit and one-on-one focused potty training...nada. I just told him he had to keep wearing diapers until he was ready to potty...fine with him. Then one day he wanted to wear underwear and go potty and that was it. 3.5yo now and finally, we're there! For him, it just had to be on his terms and in his time...his choice. Now he still has accidents, but they are intentional. He peed on his brother yesterday, as well as our big popcorn bowl. Oh, and a stool he stood on so he could see how far he could pee across the playroom.

I also talked a lot about how other kids we saw that were his age were going potty, wearing underwear, and celebrated every potty time.

ETA: The first two days, I took him no matter what every 30min., then the next two it was every 45min. Then after that, I just let him tell me. He also thinks it's awesome to take aim at something in the potty

[countrymom]

Based on what we successfully did with our two, I would advise taking a few days off. I think it is just too difficult those first few days and for our boys, we really had to just stay to task. I put diapers and pull-ups away, gave lots of liquids and focused on a 3 step progression:
1. put on toilet every 15 minutes and super praise when you get lucky and they actually go on the toilet
2. move from #1 to them figuring out how to go when placed on the toilet. At this point I put them on every 1/2 to 45 minutes, depending on fluids (and adjusted accordingly if we didn't make it)
3. Finally progress to them being able to tell us they had to go, even if it was not on time at first.
We used sticker charts (small reward when full) and mini m&m's. I praised like crazy the successes and just kept even keeled with the accidents. The "refusals" to sit on the toilet I just ignored and kept a pleasant voice (one of mine was a pro at the whole not going to sit, not going to go routine), but they did sit on the toilet and they did not get off until mommy said. This is why I highly recommend not to try to homeschool during this time. I would have been nuts real fast and I believe we would not have been as successful. Good luck!

[crlacey]

I don't have any advise for you since my DD was like others mentioned who just did it herself at 18 months. Fast forward to DS, he just turned 4 and still refuses to use a potty no matter what types of bribery you use. We even tried having him help clean up the messes and it didn't phase him. I've taken the mindset that one day he will make the choice to do it and potty training will be done then. Until then, he gets diapers like babies and that's ok with him.

(BTW, DS has been on meds for constipation for 2 years now and Dr. just ok'ed the potty training, but I think we missed our window of opportunity.)

[Busymomma1]

It sure does take focus, doesn't it??? Maybe just wait til summer? Then you can concentrate on it. I trained all 3 of mine in the summer. The weather is warmer, so they can run around in their undies! And girls can wear little dresses, so easier than pulling up pants. And if you stay outside a lot, less mess in the house! I found we also had to devote the 1st 3-4 days to just staying home and giving total focus to getting on the potty every 30-60 minutes. A little reward (treat) for each success helped, and then offering a trip to Toys R Us when they could go "x" amt of times (both pee and BM's) without accidents also helped. With my kids, the pattern was they got the "pee" part before the BM part. My older son took only 2-3 weeks, total (like 1 week to get the pee part, another 1-2 for BM), but my youngest got the "pee" part, and then we battled months and months on the "messier" part! Ugh! But one week, he got diarrhea, and then he always got on the potty. It's been great since! So I think there is "something" to the "being ready" aspect, "something" to the "obedience" aspect, and "something" to the "when they decide" aspect. No easy answers, but I think whatever you choose, it's going to require some focus! And requiring obedience to at least sit.

So my bottom line is to do it when you can focus on it... whether that be wait til summer, or take a few days off of school! She'll get it! It's just a matter of when...

[jenntracy]

i remember using some kind of candy for my son when he trained. my 2nd kid just kinda started on her own and we went along with her.Now my 3rd kid just turned 2yr old (the youngest age to start of all 3 of them) and seems to know how to go and will go when we aren't even paying attention. so when she does go we jsut go along with it.
I know what you mean about the kids finding things to do when you go to help a toddler who is potty training. but "I" feel it is important to go when the kid is ready. i just believe in easing them into it and to me it isn't an obedience thing. like i said, my 3rd jsut started goin on her own. can take off her cloth diaper and sit on the potty and even dump it in the toilet. We didn't do much training at all. i guess she just figured she was ready and had watched everyone else go potty. usuallyif i have to go, i will ask her if she has to go.

i had a friend who had a kid that would pee but would not go #2 in the potty. she jsut left him alone and when he was ready , he was ready. He might have been 4 bythte time he was fully trained and like a previous post, the kid was fine with wearing a diaper.didn't bother him.
don't know if that helps but that is what is happening around our house