Just doing the best I can

[JenO]

Hi!

We just started BLHFHG a while back. I love it and my kids really seem to be enjoying it too. I know that I am in a unique situation with my family in that my oldest, not even quite 9 has profound special needs. I am her primary caregiver and for many reasons, she has been very needy lately. Then I have an (almost) 7, 5, 3.5, and 2 year old...baby on the way too. My plan is to use HOD halfspeed. We homeschool year round, which we really enjoy. But, lately...with my daughter's increased neediness, i just do the best that I can with homeschooling. I would say my strongest area is that I am consistent with things, and I think we have reaped the rewards from that. Even when I can't quite get up to half speed, I still see my kids learning well. My (almost) 7 year old is becoming a great reader, and enjoys it. Doing well with writing and math too. My 5 year old is doing well with taking off with reading and handwriting. I am so proud of them.

Sometimes, I feel a bit sad when I think that I cannot do all of the things that other moms are doing homeschool-wise with their kids. But, with God's grace, I am seeing that what I am doing right now and in the past has been enough, and even more than enough (I hope and pray!) Anyway, I don't really have a place to share these kinds of thoughts. Just thought I would share them here.

[mamaloves4]

Hi Honey (I don't normally call people that, but I just was at your blog and such tenderness for you and your family brought it to the tip of my fingers)

You are doing a great job, don't second guess yourself just because you are doing what you can. In fact, you are doing your best and that is what is the most important thing. The Lord has given you a special road to walk down and He is gently leading you(Isaiah 40:11). I love that verse!

Simply rest and trust in Him and let His love and graciousness continue to shine through you!

Jess

[JenO]

well...thank you, Jess. What a pathetic afternoon I've had. Right before I sat down with my 7 (birthday on Sat!) and 5 year old to read some wonderful books, I *really* shut my thumb in a door. I cried like a baby, but then gathered myself to do some school with my kids. (Sigh)...anyway, your encouragment was wonderful, Jess. My son just read an entire chapter of Clara and the Bookwagon, with hardly any help. It brings me so much joy to hear him read! God's grace is truly sufficient amidst my weaknesses! And it is true that He does gently lead us as moms and teaching at home, isn't it? I just tend to be a little hard on myself and even my kids at times, I think. It's sooo nice to connect with other moms.

[3sweeties]

Wow! I think you are doing a WONDERFUL job with your kids! You are doing just what God has called you to do and that is all that matters. I cannot relate exactly to your situation, but my sister-in-law has multiple special needs, so I am familiar with a lot of the realities and emotions that go with that in a family. I so admire my MIL for being her primary caregiver and loving her so unconditionally. I think you and my MIL are truly demonstrating Christ's Love to someone who can't give back much at a level that most of us can't even begin to comprehend. (((HUGS)))

[mariaw]

I want to encourage you! Your children are learning from EVERYTHING in your house, not just the curriculum. They have a opportunity that other hs-ed children don't have to learn compassion and patience and selflessness and on and on, just from the way that you lovingly care for your special needs child. God gave you your specific children for a reason. But remember that He also, in His great wisdom, gave YOU SPECIFICALLY to your children as their mom for a reason, too. YOU are exactly what they need!!

[JenO]

Thanks again for the encouragement!

[playschool]

You're doing a great job. I cannot imagine having all that you have going in your life. Just remember that God is with you and will sustain you even in these tough times. Although I am not in the same situation as you, I also have a son with special needs and I too feel like we cannot partake in all of the things that other homeschool families do. Although he is just physically handicapped (he has spina bifida), I get so bogged down with his therapies and his bathroom care that I too become discouraged. Your situation is more difficult than mine. I know at times I just feel like no other mom I know understands what I am going through because most or all of my friends do not have a child with special needs. I imagine if I am feeling these things than you must be feeling them to a even greater degree. Hang in there! When I was pregnant with our fourth child, I remember getting really overwhelmed. We were starting a new bathroom procedure for our son which was difficult to get used to and involved a lot of time and didn't always work the way we wanted it to. I remember being tired, feeling sick due to my pregnancy, and frustrated that things were not working well with the procedure and with homeschooling at that time. I would frequently find myself crying and singing the song "Press On" by Selah. My older dd thought I was nuts at the time, but oh well.
Those days, I was just lucky if I had the strength to teach my kids the 3 R's. Don't be hard on yourself. HTH

[water2wine]

I have one with special needs as well. It sounds like not as severe as yours. But I just wanted to say that there are seasons with special kids and that leads to seasons with your family. I think we just need to rest in Him and ride those out and trust He knew that not just you would have a special child but that your other children would have a sibling with special needs as well. But I know that feeling of how can I give my other kids what they deserve when so much of my time goes to giving this child what they need. God has a wonderful way of balancing things out in the end and providing. It sounds to me like you are doing a great job. One thing that has helped me is to find ways to make private time with my other kids. If that means doing it later or earlier or while the other one is tied up with something like therapy (we have done a lot of school in therapy and doctor waiting rooms). Just ask God to bless your time and He will. Hang in there it is a special call and it does create different situations not matter how "good" you do it there will be trials. So know that if your heart is for Him and your heart is also for them you that doing the best you can is just what they need.

[spidermansmum]

I just wanted to say -Your doing a great job.Its hard sometimes to feel that the other ones are missing out - when in actual fact they are gaining so much more that we can not measure.

[my3sons]

Jen - I like your approach! Consistency is almost the #1 thing that makes or breaks our lives. We can be impulsive and unplanned sometimes, but mostly consistency is what causes school to get done well. The routines and habits we establish are what our dc will remember the most when it's all said and done. Slow and steady wins the race, right? We knew getting into this homeschooling lifestyle that it would be a journey. It cannot - nor should be - rushed. You have some excellent habits in place here - homeschooling half-speed year round. Eventually, when your dc reach the older, more independent HOD guides, they will be able to do their plans daily, with you checking in on this or that, and reserving your teaching time for what it is really needed at that age. And this will give you more time to devote to your youngers then. This is simply a stage - a busy one - and you are navigating it very well. Hold your head up high - you are doing well!

In Christ,
Julie

[Carrie]

JenO,

Your post touched my heart tonight, and I just wanted to uplift you and encourage you that the Lord knows what our children need and He will equip them with the needed skills to do the work that He has designed them to do. When I keep that beautiful image in the forefront of my mind, I feel the pressure release off of my shoulders knowing He knows what each child's call will be, and He will give them what they need in spite of what I may or may not do with their education. Yes, it is my responsibility to be a good steward with what He has given me and called me to do, but ultimately only the Lord can prepare our kiddos for His special purpose.

Blessings,
Carrie

[water2wine]

Your post touched my heart tonight, and I just wanted to uplift you and encourage you that the Lord knows what our children need and He will equip them with the needed skills to do the work that He has designed them to do. When I keep that beautiful image in the forefront of my mind, I feel the pressure release off of my shoulders knowing He knows what each child's call will be, and He will give them what they need in spite of what I may or may not do with their education. Yes, it is my responsibility to be a good steward with what He has given me and called me to do, but ultimately only the Lord can prepare our kiddos for His special purpose.

And praise God for that! Who of us is equipped for any of this. Thank God all we have to do it keep our heart for Him and He carries us and leads them! This is a great reminder. I needed to hear it as well.